A Journal of a Broken Personality

I'm learning about Brother

I'm learning, I'm learning about Brother

I'm so blessed to have 2 brother, the eldest Api and youngest Suli. Two complete opposite individual but both that I love dearly. My older brother is quiet and reserved, well mannered, and odd in some levels, very neat in his ironing and folding of clothes, a splendid baker, yet even in that his workmanship is neat completely organized. Api loves to read, most of the time we see him reading may it be a novel, fantasy book or comic Api is always reading something. Then there is Suli, always talking, asking questions, social able, far from neat a typical boy he is gym fanatic, a collector of gadgets and things which I consider mostly rubbish.

My brothers have always looked after me. Just like every other sibling growing up we had our moments of argument and fights. I remember years back as a child I did something to annoy the older one, he ran after me with the rolling pin I ran to my father for cover but Api did hit me with the rolling pin and it was at that moment my father told him to never to lay a hand on his sisters as he was the only one to discipline us. That was it never again did he lay a hand. As for Suli because our age gap is closer did we have our share fair of throwing things at each other, teasing calling names, fighting but when we got older he and I became very close.

Brothers are interesting, Api is very respectful, never talks back to my parents, and is obedient. He looks out for the whole family, supporting us financially even spoiling my sister and I at times, Suli on the other hand is strong willed, impatient social able witty Intelligent, I feel what so much responsible for my brother because I exposed him to the party lifestyle. My brothers have been there for me, there was one incident when I was 19 and decided to pack and go my own way, that didn't last within a few months I wanted to go back home so I called my older brother who happily came to my rescue to return home. When a relationship didn't work out and I wanted to return home, my younger brother was just a phone call away and sure enough he came.

My two brothers mean the world to me and as a sister I'm learning about the roles I play, indeed one day we all will be married and will start our own families but there is an important role that sibling must play it is more than just being a playmate growing up together, more than fights, much more then helping out in home works, giving advice, or getting financial aid in the future if there ever be trouble. The people who become our siblings are very important and the responsibility that comes with it.

There is an important lesson in Exodus 2:1-8 "and a man of the house of Levi went and took a wife a daughter of Levi. v2 So the woman conceived and bore a son, and when she saw that he was a beautiful child, she hid him three months. v3 but when she could no longer hide him, she took an arc of bulrushes for him, daubed it with asphalt and pitch, put the child in it, and laid it in the reads by the river bank. v4 and his sister stood afar off, to know what would be done to him. v5 Then the daughter of pharaoh came down to bathe at the river. And her maidens walked along the riverside and when she saw the ark among the reeds, she sent her maid to get it. v6 and when she opened it, she saw the child, and behold the baby wept. So she had compassion on him, and said "this is one of the Hebrews children". v7 Then his sister said to pharaohs daughter, "shall I go and call a nurse for you from the Hebrew woman, that she may nurse the child for you?'' v8 and pharos daughter said "go" so the maiden went and called the child's mother."

I've read the story of baby Moses many times before, and usually the star of the story is surprise, surprise! Moses. but re-reading this story for a what seem like a millionth time I saw it from a different perspective the Holy spirit showed me how important Miriam is. In verse 4 we see that Miriam kept an eye out for her baby brother, we don't know how long she trailed beside her brother at the river banks, maybe her friends were playing and called out to her to come to join in as a child she could have just left, imagine the fun she could have seen them in but she didn't. Who knows maybe there were mosquitoes that could have bothered the unconfutable reeds that could have given her a rash and many other factors that could have distracted or pulled her away, we don't know. But we see that Miriam made sure she kept her eyes on her brother.

That's the responsibility of having a sibling to be like Miriam and keep a watch over Moses. Having a brother is my first ministry, the nuclear family are the first people that you are responsible to share the gospel. Miriam looked out for her brother when baby Moses was found by the princess, Miriam spoke with wisdom and suggested to find a Hebrew woman to nurse him, it's that responsibility that we have to have towards our brothers, that when they get trapped in life that we the sisters come and step in with Godly wisdom.

November 2017 the Lord got me up at 5am to do my daily prayers. I had an exam paper that morning but the Lord had prompted me to pray for certain people and one of them was my older brother, I was exhausted the night before doing some extra reading. The Lord showed that he was in distress and depressed, that the spirit of suicide was attacking him and that he was going to die. On my bedroom floor I broke down into the most uncontrollable sob, can you imagine being told that your brother was going to die and he was thousands of miles away out at sea and you couldn't do anything about it. I was helpless, afraid and with no hope I cried out to God to save my brother, I began to petition for his life, my cries were so loud it was as if I was wailing at a funeral. "FATHER PLEASE, SAVE MY BROTHER, MY BROTHER SAVE MY BROTHER!" Begging that God would intervene. I was so desperate that God do something about it, on and on I cried out to God I really didn't know what to do but I only knew that God was the only one that could save him, what felt like eternity God intervened he spoke and said he was safe I finally was at peace.

On another occasion in early 2019 during my night prayers the Lord this time had shown my younger brother also dying by choking on his vomit, I began to pray and rebuke the spirit of death, a fear began to grip me and thoughts of it happening at that very money, my sobs turned into desperate petitions for his life, I called out to God again on my bedroom floor to save him, I cried out saying "FATHER SAVE MY BROTHER PLEASE, THAT'S MY BROTHER, YOU DID IT FOR API AND I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT FOR JUR!" I felt a panic come over me, the thoughts of it happening at that very moment, I wanted to grab my phone and call him, but that wouldn't help I somehow knew that was the tactic of the devil to stop me from praying, what a battle it was, my mind was going berserk the fear was so intense that 2 Timothy 1:7 came into to mind "for God has not given a spirit of fear, but of power and love and of a sound mind" the devil began to put more pressure, there was an evil presence I was sure that I had to press on and that the devil was not going to leave me to pray in peace he was going to throw everything at me as possibly as he could. Indeed he would put up a fight it was not going to be easy because he was unsuccessful the first time, I knew I couldn't do this alone and that I needed to depend on God. So as faithful God is he came to my rescue where the Holy Spirit brought into remembrance the scripture Psalms 46:1 "God is our refuge and strength. A very present help in trouble" God is true to his word; he was the only one I could run to for protection, he was the only one to give me the strength that I needed and he was the only one present in my trouble. Sure enough after the petitions and rebuke the Lord had assured me he was ok. I praise God that the Lord showed me what was to happen in the future if my brother didn't change his ways, I made a call to Suli to tell him what the Lord had showed me.

As much as my brothers can be annoying, or we hardly talk because of distance I am STILL responsible for them. I have a responsibility to pray over them all throughout my life. I am constantly reminded to pray for them by the Holy Spirit. God is gracious enough to show what can happen in the future, can you imagine if we don't stand in the gap for our loved ones? how unexpected deaths could happen? But if we press on and diligently stand in the gap and press on in prayer for our siblings God is faithful to show the plans and the attacks of the devil. My job as a sister is to be obedient, to pray, encourage and give biblical advice. I have to encourage them both to fight the good fight of faith, to persevere to remind him that this life will pass away and all that remains is our choice on eternity.

Galatians 6:9 "let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart." 

 Never give up on your brothers no matter how far away they are from God, petition plead and pray on their behalf. Gods hand is not too short to reach out and save them, he is mighty to save. Yet even if they are saved never stop praying for them continue to bear their burden continue to fellowship with them and their families. Take time out to talk about the goodness of God and share in-depth of the truth, be there for them in the good times and bad. Having a sibling is a huge and serious responsibility. You are accountable.

I'm learning, I'm learning about Brother