Summer with the Pine Twins

Irrational Treasure: Part 6

Dipper's p.o.v.

We wave goodbye to the two officers as their train departed before Trembly turned to my sister. "You've done a great service to your country, Mabel, as thanks I'd like to make you an official U.S Congressman," He pulls out a top hat from his jacket and places it on her head as she shouts "I'm legalizing everything!" He then turns to me and (y/n). "And Rogerick, Valentina!" "Actually-" I tried to correct him on our names but he cut me off. "You dear kids are on your way to unlocking the mysteries of this great land, so I'd like you both to have my President's key!" He hands me the key and we head back home, the whole way Trembley told us stories.

Mabel's p.o.v.

"And then he chased me around and spanked me with a paddle for like three hours! Bottom line George Washington was a jerk!" "Agreed!" I  say when we spot Pacifica and her pose watching girls spin ribbons around a standy poley thing. I run over to her shouting "Hey Pacifica! I uncovered a government conspiracy about the eighth and a half President of the United States! Who's silly now?" "What?! Who is that idiot?!" She asks and we look to see Trembly chasing an eagle, trying to fight it while shouting "Put up your dukes you bald fiend!"

 "The eighth and a half President of America! I know what you're thinking: How is he still alive? Well, turns out you can hibernate in peanut brittle and-" I was cut off by Pacifica laughing at me before she exclaimed "Wow you really are a sad dumb little girl. Nice top hat by the way."

 Her parents laugh as they get in the car. "Ooo, I see your car is stuck in the mud, enjoy walking home," Dipper taps my shoulder and points at the article as he whispered "Aren't you gonna tell her about her ate-gray ampa-gray?" "You know what Dipper? I've got nothing to prove. I've learned that being silly is awesome!" I tell him, putting my sweater back on.

Dipper's p.o.v.

"Well, I haven't learned anything! Hey Pacifica!" I shout after whistling before their car could drive off and (y/n) and I run up and hand her the article as I tell her "Nathaniel Northwest didn't found Gravity Falls and your whole family is a sham." "You're nothing more than a washed-up joke," (y/n) chimes in before we say in unison "Deal with it!" She looks at the article before looking to her mom for answers. "What?! MUUUUUUUUUM!" 

"Man, revenge is underrated that felt awesome!" I exclaim and (y/n) nods and we high-five before Quentin approaches us. "Children, I am needed elsewhere, just know that I'll always be right here...On the negative twelve dollar bill!" He hands the dollar to (y/n) who looks it over before stating "Woah...This is worthless." "It's less than worthless my child! Trembley away!" He hops backward onto a horse and rides off. "Where do you think he's going?" Mabel asks and I answer with "I'm gonna say off a cliff." "And into a raging river," (y/n) chimes in.

Grunkle Stan's p.o.v.

I had been standing here all day when the kids finally find me and asked what happened. I spent the next few minutes telling them about all I went through today. "And then Soos came by and talked to me for like an hour!" "You've been through so much," Mabel sympathizes with me when (y/n) said, "Hey Dipper, Trembley said the President's key unlocks any lock in America, why don't we try it?" President's key? Dipper pulls out a fancy key and the padlock fell, I was free! "It works!" Ignoring that.

 "So what's with the top hat?" I ask. "I'm a Congressman!" "Pardon me?" "You are officially pardoned," The kids start laughing, I don't get what's funny. "Oi, you are never gonna make sense are you kid?" "No I'm not Grunkle Stan, no I'm not. Mabel away!" She hops backward into a bunch of trash cans, that was smart. "I'm okay!" She shouts.