Summer with the Pine Twins

Little Gift Shop of Horrors: Part 1

Grunkle Stan's p.o.v.

It was a stormy day today which meant there wouldn't be that much business today so I went to close up shop when from the peephole I see someone approaching the shack so I quickly grabbed my lantern and thrust open the door for them. "Well hello there traveler. I see your car broke down on this lonesome country road. A place so remote, that no one can hear your screams!" They start to back away.

"Pretend I didn't say that. Come in, come in but be warned if you enter you may be subjected to my tales. Tales designed to sell my merchandise!" I tell them as I lead them into the gift shop with a laugh. "Sorry I was thinking of something funny I heard earlier," The traveler starts to look around as I state "You've traveled to the Mystery Shack after hours. A time when only our creepiest and most cursed objects are for sale like that thing there," I point to some moving thing that looked a glob of Frankenstein's monster with more eyes and mouths.

 "No? Not a fan? Too many orphases? Alright, I can tell what you're looking for is this disembodied hand!" I shove a disembodied hand in the traveler's face when they point at the price tag. "Why is it so expensive? Well, that's quite a tale and it's called Hands Off!!" They pick up a glowing red and yellow eyeball and I take it from them. "No seriously hands off that's not for sale," I place the eyeball down away from them and continue my story. "Hands Off!!!"

I had taken the kids to the Gravity Falls Swap Meet where we walked around looking at all the stalls set up. Mabel soon messing with the bobbleheads. "They agree with everything I say!" And Dipper messes with the glasses stand. "Hey (y/n) look professor glasses, they make me look like a genius," She giggles when he runs straight into the glasses stand causing her to wince as she helped him up.

I continue to look around when I spot a purple table with a bunch of gold watches on display. "Look at these full gold beauties. They're mob boss quality," I take a look at the old lady running the stall who glares at me from the top of the magazine she was reading. Challenge accepted I pull the kids close and whisper "Alright kids, prepare to watch the delicate art of the deal," I slam my hand on the table asking "Hey hag face how much for the junk watches?" "They are not for sale. Not for you Stan Pines. The wind whispers your name!" She shouts back as the wind suddenly picks up causing Tyler's chimes to go off. "Alright I get it you're creepy. Anyway, less talk-ey more watch-ey," I shove some money toward her and grab a watch.

She tugs my hand back shouting "Get your hands off my watch!" I pull my hand out of her grasp and walk away shuddering. "Yeesh, freakshow!" "Wow, someone needs to work on their social skills," Mabel comments, and I chime in showing off the watch. "And their observation skills. Boom! Good job heisting hands."

"Grunkle Stan, are you seriously shoplifting from a witch? That sounded like a curse," Dipper advises and I mock him as I roll my eyes. "That sounded like a curse. Hey anybody want a wet blanket? We got a wet blanket for sale," Everyone around us laughs before (y/n) grabs Dipper's hand and starts to walk off stating "Well don't come crying to us for help when you lose both your hands or something."

I wake up the next morning and head to the bathroom, looking in the mirror to see no changes and I laugh. "Ha, curse. Yeah right...AH! Wait is this curse ugly or normal ugly?" I squint at the mirror, nah that's normal ugly. "Heh, looks like I got off scot-free," I lift my hands to see they were gone! It looked like they had been chopped off, all that was left was a purple hue on both my wrists. I can't let the kids know, Dipper and (y/n) will start telling me off about this...But what do I do?

I ended up putting cooking mittens over my wrists and continued on with my day. But when I finished making breakfast that's when the truth was revealed. "Alright kiddos, breakfast time. Prepare your mouths for-" I dropped the pan and the mitts fell off, all three grimacing at my missing hands. "AH! NO HANDS! GRUNKLE STAN WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HANDS?!" Mabel starts screaming. "So I might've gotten cursed a little, but the watch looks nice right?" I try to shrug it off by admiring the watch when the witch's reflection appeared and her voice echoes through the kitchen.

"Foolish man. Thieving hands find wicked fates, you must return what isn't yours-" I put the mitt back on with my teeth where the old hag is muffled out. "That's better." "Ugh, I told you, Grunkle Stan, you gotta give that watch back and apologize," Dipper starts reprimanding me. "What?! That old crone should apologize to me for denying my right to buy cheap junk. I don't need hands. I've got self-respect," I try to drink some coffee but spill it. I try to eat but end up smacking myself with bacon instead.

With a sigh, I turn to Mabel and ask "Mabel sweetie? Will you make your Uncle some hands?" Within a half-hour, she sticks to pink plastic cups on my arms with forks taped onto the ends before sprinkling glitter over them. "La, la, la, la, la! Hand makeover. Say hello to your new "hands" in quotes," I try to noogie her which ended up with me ripping out some of her hair. "Thanks, sweetie. See? My hands look great, I'm ready to take on the day!"

The day didn't go that well. First I scared Lazy Susan, I couldn't bowl and ended up dropping my ball, causing Tyler to trip on it which ended up destroying a tv, and when I went grocery shopping? "Hey, Mr. Pines! Should we play toss me a dozen eggs like we always do?" "No Jimmy wait, not today! NOT TODAY!" When I meet back up with the kids covered in eggs they all give me a look and I sigh. "Let's find that witch," (y/n) and Dipper had managed to track them down to a cave in the middle of the woods and (y/n) explained, "According to the swap meet pamphlet the hand witch lives in her horrible hand witch lair on hand witch mountain." "Stop saying, hand witch