Moving On (KathNiel)

Chapter 49

{Look the multimedia, they're so perf. omg}

LUKE's POV

"Oh" I handed her the beer. Apat na bote ang dala kong beer. Hindi daw makatulog si Kylie kaya dinala ko nalang siya dito sa dalampasigan. Mukhang hindi umepekto 'yung slow dance namin.

Also, I wanted to talk to her.

"Thanks" she said saka tinungga 'yung beer. Nagulat naman ako sa asal niya. Iba na talaga siya.

Umupo ako sa tabi niya. Naka-indian seat kami pareho sa harap ng dalampasigan, the moonlight serves as our light tonight. The hummed of the wind made us comfy.

"Mababa ba alcohol tolerance mo?" I asked while opening my beer.

"Before. Ngayon, hindi na ata. 3 bottles before I get tipsy"

"Pareho pa rin 'yon. Mababa pa rin" I said and drunk a bit.

Tahimik lang ang bumabalot sa amin. I looked at her for a moment, malapit niya nang maubos ang isang bote. Ang lakas pala niyang uminom. Hindi naman siya ganyan dati ah.

"Staring is rude" she snapped.

I shift my gaze on the beer I was holding. "I'm not."

"Finished. Can I get my other one?" she asked like a child asking for a permission to her parents. Walang paligoy-ligoy iniabot ko sa kanya ang isa pa. Tinungga naman niya agad 'to.

Ibang klase talaga 'to.

"Did you know that I remember myself, five years ago, at this state? But the only difference is I'm broken and in mysery. Watching the stars sparkling, embracing the cold breeze and beers with my side. Naalala ko pa, umiiyak ako that time. For me, night loses hope and missing my love ones, I left here. Kaya kada kagabi, umiiyak ako. I don't have any companion too" she narrate na ikinagulat ko.

Nagku-kuwento siya, it means medyo lasing na siya.

"Go on. Continue"

She sipped her beer and laughed bitterly. "Ang hirap kayo iwanan dito. I really misses all of you a lot--especially you. Ang akala niyo, ang pag-alis ko dito ay madali lang, pero ang totoo, ang hirap sobra sobra. I need to adjust and take all the courage to adapt. Kapag umaga, I'm happy and excited, but at night, I was helplessly crying on the verandah. First day ko pa lang sa London nun, I was crying and crying all over again. Nagtagal 'yan ng isang linggo until tuwing gabi nalang. Sometimes, I get drunk of myself to stop thinking of shitty things kaya natuto na akong uminom, but unfortunately, it didn't help"

Nanatili lang akong nakikinig sa kanya. It's my time to know her story.

Naubos niya na 'yung isang bote pa sa isang lagok lang.

"It's really hard. Wanna know why?" she looked directly into my eyes, "..because I left my love ones here. Unluckily, you belong there. Araw-araw kitang iniisip that time, iba kasi noong nagkahiwalay tayo because kahit ilang meters o inches man ang layo ko sa'yo, I still know your condition. Pero, malayo tayo eh, hindi nasusukat ng kilometers. That's why I was too worried and homesicked of your love. Masokista ba? Haha, 'yan kasi ang akala ko noon. Na kahit saktan mo ako ng paulit-ulit noon, hindi natitinag 'yung pagmamahal ko sa'yo. My love for you is steel and immortal. I hate that kind of feeling!"

Tinitigan ko lang siya. Pain was evident to her dashing face.

"I hate but I can't! Minsan naiisip ko na bakit mo kaya ako sinaktan? Sabi mo noon, hindi mo ako papaluhain, pero ginawa mo? I'm still clueless, Luke. I wanted to be away to you, natatakot kasi ako sa sarili ko noon, na baka mabaliw ako sa kaka-salo sa mga sakit na ipinaramdam mo sa'kin. Even though, I loved you, I still love myself. I'm not selfless, medyo nga lang. Kasi istupida ako at dakilang martyr. Alam mo ba, 'yan ang mga napag-tanto ko nung nasa London ako. Thus, keeping me away from you is helpful....somehow" her voice cracked.