The Pretty List ~ A Lams AU

✨12 ~A God✨

also, we start chapter like this all the time now, so stfu and take it its a fan fic

and like, i really bullshited a bit to get the word count higher

"Calm the fuck down."

"I'm not stressed." He very obviously lies.

I sigh and watch John causally pace up and down the room. For a public figure, he's a really bad liar. It's voting today. Well not actual voting, it's just photography day. Where they take the pictures which get uploaded to the website, then people vote.

"Yes you are." I point out.

"No, I'm not. I do this every year. If anything you should be stressed."

I squirm slightly. I am actually, a lot rests down on this. I want to get top ten, I really do. It's the reason I'm having to sleep with him.

Oh my god, out of context that's awful. You know what I mean!

"I-I do this every year too."

He looks at me, and somehow seems to pick up on the fact I'm anxious, and sighs, though not like he's annoyed. It's a different type of sigh.

"Apply to the teenage girls, " He says causally, "They're the ones who vote in mass-millions. Especially the straight, white, cis, basic bitch brand."

I nod slowly. Voting is about a 2/3 split. Most of it is by the public, yet there is also a board of members who help as well.

(not my mind now imagining a board of penis's-)

He looks me up and down, with that awfully scrutinizing look he has, before going over to our (ew, I can't even get my own) desk. He pulls out the drawer and rummages through the mess of papers that he claims are 'organised'.

He takes one our and sits down on the bed next to me, placing it in front of us.

"Do this pose," He says, pointing at me in the picture. It's obviously a newspaper cut-out, taken by like a photographer, or something, I don't know. I recognise where its from, the date. That one was alright.

I raise an eyebrow, and look back up at him "It's not really a p-""

"Just do it. It's the one where you look the least ugly."

"... Can you not just say pretty, or handsome, or beautiful, or something?!"

He meets my eyes.

"It's the one where you look the least Shrek like."

"Ok-" I sigh looking back down at the paper, and picking it up.

My eyes instead focus on John, next to me in the picture. The way he has that weirdly attractive grin on his face, on of his hands is hooked onto my waist, the other tucked into his pocket. Devilishly, I suppose that's the way you could describe that smile.

God, he's really hot, why does he even wear a shirt?

I mean.

No.

No homo, no homo. I mean it in a friend way. You can say these things as friends, yeah.

"I guarantee you'll be in the top ten." He says, jogging me out of my thoughts.

I really fucking hope he's right y'know.

time skip brought to u by my awful spelling, like wtf

"Are you almost ready?"

"Yeah, gimme a sec."

"... Why are you wearing jeans?"