The Pretty List ~ A Lams AU

✨16 ~ This Chapter Is Just Anxiety✨

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Danny DeVito

"Alex I'm gonna throw up."

"No you're not."

"Alex I'm gonna die."

"No you're not."

"Alex I'm gonna throw myself off the top floor window."

"No you're- HEY NO WAIT DON'T!"

"I'm so stressed. I think I may spontaneously combust."

"Not physically possible. John, you need to calm. It will be ok. It has been ok for the last six years, you wont fail now."

"But six years is the record, everyone else did!"

It's the end of voting today. Voting ends in two hours and we find out the results at 1 pm exactly as they are uploaded to the website. Lets just say, I don't think I have ever been this stressed. This is the reason I've done all this, and had to put up with John, and therefore gained a crush on him.

"You are not everyone," I reassure him, "You haven't done anything wrong, you're fine."

I know I may seem calm, but I'm freaking out. Everything I've worked for in these past few months comes down to here. Here we find out if it's all in vain. It probably is. Oh my god what if it is? What if I've gone backwards?!

"I think I might die." John mutters again.

I gulp nervously, "Me too."

Neither of us slept last night. We kind of just, did nothing for 12 hours. I'm really tired, and I was, but I couldn't sleep. We kind of just stayed up in each other's arms.

It was very homo, you jealous?

Fuck yeah you are.

Homo deprived weirdos.

I've maybe come to terms with my crush on John. It was a surprise sure (it was not, for anybody. at all), but it wont change anything between us. Except for that fact that I want him to hold me, and kiss me, and spend lost of time with me, and forever maybe.

Ok maybe it changes a few things but I'll keep them inside. I hope.

I'm not too outward with my emotions. I think. Yeah I'm pretty sure.

Like there's no way he will know, guaranteed.

"Do you think we did it?" I ask quietly.

"I hope." He shrugs. Helpful. "You're a guaranteed top 10 for sure though."

"Who even is number 10?"

"Angelica."

I hum nonchalantly. Damn I really hope he's right.

time skip brought to u by bennyshniffle cabbagepatch

"John, calm down." Peggy says, and I agree with her.

"See, John, even Peggy thinks your overreacting." I point out, raising my eyebrows pointedly at him.

He looks over at us and raises one eyebrow, "I'm not panicking."

I look at him for about three whole seconds before reaching forward and gently taking his hand from his mouth where he was relentlessly chewing at his fingernails.

"That's unrelated."

He taps his foot on the floor, doing a very bad job of hiding his stress before muttering "What time is it?"

"Uhhh, 12:57." Maria says, checking her watch. Oh god only three minutes. Oh no. Apparently the top 10 had a special tradition of all finding out the results together. The worst thing would be someone dropping off the top 10, can you imagine how embarrassing that would be?