Among Us Logic book

Shower thoughts/questions with our high af bean

I found these on the internet btw!

Stoner: even if schools did teach us about how to pay taxes and rents, we still wouldn't be listening 

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Stoner: what if phobias were based on how we died in our previous lives?

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Stoner: water is like a portal to a dimension without gravity and you can't breathe

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Stoner: randomly hearing your favorite song on the radio is more satisfying than playing it on your one device

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Stoner: "Go to bed, you'll feel better in the morning" is the human version of "Did you turn it off and on?"

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Stoner: if my calculator had a history, it would be more cursed than my internet history 

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Stoner: lawyers hope you get sued, doctors hope you get sick, cops hope you're criminal, mechanics hope you have car trouble, but only a thief wishes prosperity for you.

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Stoner: as a kid my parents taught me not to believe everything I see on TV, now I have to teach them not to believe everything they see on FaceBook

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Stoner: what if Mars was our previous planet, but we f*cked up the climate so badly, we had to evacuate all the people to Earth on a shuttle, and the shuttle was the asteroid that wiped out all the dinosaurs?

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Stoner: tall people are expected to reach out and help shorter people get something they can't reach, but if a tall person asked a short person to pick up something they dropped on the floor, it'd be insulting

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Stoner: if I stand up 10 minutes early, I treat it like 2 hours and still end up late

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Stoner: when you say "forward" or "back" your lips move in those directions 

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Stoner: I've woken up over 10.000 times and still am not used to it

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Stoner: tobacco companies kill their best customers and condom companies kill their future customers

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Stoner: there's someone in the world that has your dream job and hates to go to work everyday 

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Stoner: "DO NOT TOUCH" would be a very unsettling thing to read in Braille 

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Stoner: after years of disliking my looks, I now realize I'm just not my type

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Stoner: people who are good looking but have a terrible personality are real life clickbait's

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Stoner: when people think about traveling to the past, they're scared to change the present, but people don't realize they can change the future

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Stoner: when you drink alcohol, you just borrow happiness from the next day

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Stoner: Cheddar understands some human words, but I can't understand his dog barks. He may be smarter than me

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Stoner: nothing is on fire, fire is on things

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Stoner: at age 25 when a female friend of mine would say she's pregnant, I won't know wether to say "oh sh*t!" or "congratulations!"

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Stoner: a guy can decline an invitation by saying his girlfriend won't let him go, and people will understand, but if a girl says her boyfriend won't let her go, people will most likely get concerned

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Stoner: Earth is like that one person who knows exactly where to stand next to a bonfire 

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Stoner: people put their kids in classrooms 7 hours a day, give them some more hours of homework, discourage them to play outside and then wonder why they're out of shape

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Stoner: history classes will get longer and harder as the time goes on

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Stoner: 1984 to 2000 seems a longer time than 2000 to 2016

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Stoner: when drone technology becomes cheap enough, handsfree umbrellas will be the sh*t

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Stoner: when Sweden is playing Denmark, the letters used will spell SWE-DEN, but the letters that won't be used will spell DEN-MARK

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Stoner: as kids, 99,9% of what we cry about is physical pain, but as adults/teens, 99,9% of what we cry about is emotional pain

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Stoner: Siri or Cortana should say "Uhm...", "Uh...", "Hmm...." or "Well..." instead of showing a buffering animation

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Stoner: your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed

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Stoner: us humans are bad at recharging. We have te charge 8 hours for 16 hours of use

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Stoner: scientists are just kids that grown up and stuck with the "Why?" phrase

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Stoner: clapping is just hitting your hands together repeatedly because you like something 

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Ok that's enough for now. Lemme know more deep thoughts! :