Second time lucky

27

I put aside the feelings of darkness brewing inside me for the sake of the children as we walked into the brightly decorated ranch style house.

There were balloons tied up at every possible surface, streamers hanging from ceilings and a big pile of presents in the corner of the living room.

"Hi, I'm Tess, Brantleys mom." A medium sized brunette introduced herself. I think she was either part Latino or Native American because she had the most beautiful, flawless olive toned skin with deep brown eyes.

"I'm Britt, Connor and Emelias mom." I smiled back.

"Well most of the kids and the moms are in the back yard. I'll walk you out there!"

I followed her to the yard which wasn't as decorated, although the pool and influx of water guns being sprayed was the indication that decorations would be moot out here anyway.

I took a seat and watched as the kids played until a familiar blonde walked outside with Tess.

"Britt?"

"Hannah?" I smiled at her as Ryan ran off to join all the other kids.

She took a seat beside me as I tried to find an appropriate topic of conversation.

"It's good to see a familiar face. Kids birthdays can be so daunting when you don't know anyone." She explained.

"Tell me about it." I agreed.

"So did you figure anything out since we talked last, you know with their dad?" She asked.

"I don't know honestly. Can I ask you something?" I decided to approach the nagging question in my head delicately. "If Ryan's dad came back, would you take him back?"

She seemed to think about it for a while before she took a sip of water and sighed. "The woman in me wants to say no, that I have been just fine on my own, but the other part of me knows that I would forgive him and take him back no matter what. Love is funny like that, you can't help it. I think about his dad all the time and I know it wasn't his fault he left."

"Yeah I get that."

"Wait didn't you have a boyfriend?" She asked.

"Yeah, me and Kyle broke up this morning." I sighed, fighting to hold myself together.

"Oh, I'm sorry. It's kind of weird we both have ex's with the same name, I guess we are just meant to be friends!"

If only she knew.

I directed the conversation in a different direction after that. The pain I felt from the breakup was still fresh, and even though it was for the best, it still hurt and I was barely keeping myself together.

After an hour of playing they did cake and presents and soon we were on our way back home. I owed it to Kyle to give him the opportunity to know his child. No matter how bad I was hurting, no good would come from his son missing out on his father.

'We need to talk, meet me at the park in fifteen.'

He didn't respond and I hoped he would show up, then I sent Hannah a text and told her to meet me at the park too.

'Ill be there.' She replied and I could only hope that the reunion would go well.

...

I tried not to think about it as the afternoon wore on. Neither of them had texted me since I asked them to meet me and I hoped that they would understand that I was trying to help, not interfere.

Once the kids were fed and asleep I curled up on the couch with a glass of white wine and thought, really thought about what I wanted for my life.