She is back. | Mafia Series #3

02

Chapter two: First day

I woke up with a really bad head ache. 

"What time is it?" Tanong ko sa sarili ko before looking at my watch. 

I muttered a curse when I found out what time is it. 

Dapat kanina pa ako umalis, I need to do something about me not having anything. Kailangan ko pumunta sa grocery ngayon para magkaroon ng laman ang ref ko, and I need to buy a few supplies for my home. Well this place isn't considered as home. 

This is the first time that I am not waking up with someone I know,  I have no one. 

I didn't have time to take a shower because the grocery will close in 3 hours. 

I put my hair in a bun and wore sweatpants together with a hoodie. A normal and typical broken hearted look. 

Nagmadali na ako, tumakbo na ako pababa sa lobby ng condo ko, and rushed through the busy streets. Wala na akong pake kung sino na ang mabangga ko, kailangan kong humabol ng train. 

I took a picture of the subway and posted it on my instagram story, at nanlaki ang mata ko dahil ang unang nagview ay si Kaede. 

She is smart, baka ngayon palang malaman niya na kung nasaan ako. 

I can't meet them and look at them straight in their eyes, kasi alam kong ako ang unang iiwas ng tingin, I am a disgrace. Isa akong kahihiyan. I mean look at myself, I'm a mess, and a stupid girl. 

I put on my earphones before going in the train, I want to isolate myself to everyone pero hindi ako mabubuhay kung ganito lang ang gagawin ko. 

People were looking at me, makikilala kaya nila ako? Sa pilipinas oo, kahit saan ako pumunta may mga camera nang nakatutok saakin pero dito? I'm not sure. 

"Wahhh!!!" Tili ng isang babae. 

I chose not to join the commotion, wala naman akong alam dyaan. 


"Ravenna Hendrix!" Sigaw pa muli nito. 

"Shit." I mouthed. 

Itinaas ko ang hood ng jacket ko at umiwas ng tingin, sakto bumukas na ang pintuan ng train kaya agad akong bumaba. Bahala na kung saan ako mapadpad basta wag lang ako makilala. 

Narating ko na ang grocery at onti lang ang tao, good. 

An hour and 30 minutes nalang ang natitira bago ito magsara. 

I got a big cart and started to get every single meat in the meat section, bahala na kung hindi ko naman ito magagamit sa pagluto at mabulok nalang pero kukunin ko. 

I got a thousand dollars left and it is equivalent to more than a hundred thousand yen. I could spend 20,000 for groceries and the rest is I don't know. 

I got every single spice in that section, bought many junk foods, bought pans and pots, bought organizers, and bought another mini fridge, there I will put everysingle beer that I will buy. 

Pumunta na ako sa cashier at isa isa ito pinunch. I don't really give a damn about the total, because I know I still have enough money. 

"Genkin de shiharaimasu ka, soretomo kurejittokādo de shiharaimasu ka?" Tanong ng babae. 

I panicked, hindi ako marunong mag-japanese. 

"Nihongo ga wakaranai" Yan ang lumabas sa bibig ko, dahil yan lang ang nagiisang sentence na alam ko. 

"Hai, do you want to pay cash or credit card?" Tanong nito. 


"Cash." Sagot ko bago umiwas ng tingin, that was embarassing. Kailangan kong matuto magjapanese if I want to stay here for a few months, or years. 

4 boxes and 6 plastic bags ang dala ko, how did I carry that? Well hindi siya considered as carrying, I was pushing the boxes one by one. 

"This is really hard." Sabi ko before getting in the cab that I called. 

Nakabalik na ako sa condo ko, at buti nalang isa sa mga empleyado doon ay tumulong saakin sa pagangat ng napamili ko. 

"Arigato." I bowed my head before closing my door. 

I hanged my new pots and pans in the kitchen I put the groceries on the counter top. 

Pumunta ako sa living room dala dala ang tatlong box. One of the box contains bookshelves, one of it has a center table, and the last one has a lamp. 

I first opened the shelves and I was just left staring at the pieces. 

"Come on, Ravenna. Walang matatapos kung hindi ka magsisimula." 

I started screwing the nails in and eventually I finished building the shelves. 

I got in my room at kinuha ang mga libro ko. Romeo and juliet and other books that I loved was there. 

Time got so fast and I already finished assembling everything. 

Napagdesisyonan kong maligo muna bago ayusin ang kitchen/pantry ko. 2 in 1 na kasi wala tayong budget para sa maraming kwarto na condominum. This has 2 rooms and one bathroom, pero hindi pa kasama doon ang kitchen at living room. 

Sakto lang naman ang laki nito, pero hindi ako sanay sa ganitong environment dahil it is still a little bit small compared to where I was living in the Philippines.

I just want to die, wala naman nang saysay pa para mabuhay ako. Pwera nalang kung ipapasa na saakin ang kompanya. 

I need to find another reason to live, in a place full of death. 

Suck it up, Ravenna. This is life, you got to live it. Even if it leads no where. 

Pagkalabas ko ng cr, nagsuot ako ng sapatos, at face mask. I want to buy potted plants. So that my place looks at least nice. 

Hindi ko na kailangan maglakad pa ng malayo dahil paglabas mo ng condo, may bilihan na ng mga halaman pagtawid. 

"Konnichiwa, how much is this?" Turo ko sa hanging plant. 

"600 yen." Nginitian ako ng matandang babae. 

She is probably in her mid 40's. 

"Can I get three of those and 5 of these." Turo ko sa mga mga medium sized potted plants. 

Tumango yung babae at kumuha ng mga lalagyanan nito. 

"I live across the street, I will just come back for the remaining ones." Ngumiti ako sa kanya. 

Pagbalik ko sa condo ko I hanged the pots in the balcony. And put a plant on each room. 

7pm na and I cooked pork adobo. 

"Ayusin mo luto mo, gusto ko malaman kung wife material ka!" He shouted across the room. Umiling ako. 

"Wag mo kainin kung hindi masarap!" Sigaw ko pabalik.

Tears started to pool under my eyes, but I wiped it so that my tears wont go into the dish that I cooked. 

Siguro sinabayan ng mundo ang mood ko at nagsimulang umulan ng malakas. 

I turned off the stove before looking out the window. 

I took a picture and captioned, 'missing you real bad, baby :(' 

I got a bowl and sat beside the window, looking at the water racing on my window. 

"The rain will be our sweet silence, come here and let's watch the raindrops racing." Tinapik niya ang pwesto sa tabi niya. We are currently in the balcony of my dads house. 

Nabasag ang mangkok na pinagkainan ko dahil sumakit nanaman ang ulo ko. 

Ravenna, pull yourself up. Tangina wag ka nang umiyak dahil nagsasayang ka ng luha. 

Someday baby, I'll look at you in the eyes with no pain. But now, all I can say is that I still love you.