chamomile valley // snk levi

twenty seven.

CHAPTER XXVII. Hydrangea

year 2020.

Coward. That's what you were. You were shitty for not having the courage to get up and greet the morning with even an ounce of goodness that must be buried deep within the underground mines of Aelindr. The sound of the outside world seemed foreign to you as you began blocking all noise until you reached your usual destination which was the school you worked for.

And you haven't visited the café since. How could you when you blew up his comfort and trust with just a simple misunderstanding.

It's been a day or two ever since that incident and you've been feeling like shit, more than before. And you deserve it, for being the shithead you were told to be. You haven't even check on him on any way, not even resulting to gossip and hearsay yet, to ease your nervous and nagging nature. Well, that was the reason why you're in this situation in the first place.

If you were in his shoes, you would've done the same thing, too. You wouldn't want people being in your business for no apparent reason. Who were you to become so annoyingly up his ass to constant baby him?

In his eyes, you were just a quick fuck. A one night lover which must've been his reason to let your guard down when there wasn't anything connecting the two of you together. He must've been doing this to people ever since the beginning of time itself. But now he's got into you, you realize how stupid you really are. You-plain, stupid you for seemingly going beyond his boundaries thinking you were more than after that night when you were a mess in every way he doesn't want in a person.

So maybe he was just desperate that one night and you succumbed to him as you were equally, if not more, desperate than he was. It must be your fault for not asking the specifics before letting him string you alone. Or maybe you were just absurdly sticking into his personal life too much when you should've been giving him space.

Although you were most certain it was the latter, you can't help but feel your heart crack at the possibilities of the first that popped to your head.

"Stop zoning out!" your roommate and co-worker snapped you out of your mind that had been digging its hole deeper.

Right now you were beside Hange in the anticipated field trip you'll be having as Erwin forced you to. It's been the third or fourth a section in SL University had gone in, now with the 104who didn't want to venture in this journey in any way. It was hard enough to find a place for them to attend other than the holy shithole, especially with a killer on the loose (hypothetical killer on the loose). In all honesty, you haven't been able to wrap your head around having to let Erwin do this to kids nonetheless.

As ruthless Erwin can be, you just figured out you'll manage to do everything you can while trying to take care of Hange at the same time. However, your problem as of the moment was to be able to tell them what hell-bent of a field trip you're going in.

"Orvois Cathedral?" Eren asked out loud during the trip towards the said chapel, earning grimaces and groans from everyone else. Of course it was him who was oblivious to the scares each of you felt.

Everyone was present, except for Armin who was still unconscious in the hospital. It wouldn't be a matter of time until they begin to suspect his absence wasn't as mild as they thought, no matter if he was the headmaster's nephew or whatnot. Each of them were fidgeting, waiting for the first person to talk about where he was. Annie, who was the closest to Armin at this point, kept quiet but was as in deep thought of what had happened. It was problematic for you to think ill of anyone, especially when you piece Annie's willingness to be a runner in the midst of questionable hours and how she had Armin's notes.