too scared to be afraid

chapter thirty-two: home

"Home is where you live, right? Or is it the people who you love the most?"

032: home

xxxx

"I don't know. Can I have some time to think on it?"

"Of course, hyung. But we've all decided to move in so I think you should too," Namjoon suggested, picking at one of the stray strings on his sweater. Hoseok found all of the boys had uneasy expressions and the reason was more than obvious. They were scattered around in a hospital room with a friend who tried to end his life again. He figured he should hurry and get released so that his friends could leave.

"Alright, well I should go check out then," he said, legs swiftly swinging over to the edge of the bed. Taehyung cried out, and he froze, looking to his friend.

"Just stay there, Yoongi hyung went to get a doctor," Taehyung said.

Wow, he had just noticed Yoongi's absence. His memory had been getting worse recently. With his will to live gone, his thoughts categorized most information as unimportant and threw it to the side. Hoseok's eyes flickered around the room, carefully surveying each and every face. His heart stung at all of the visible worry and concern etched into each of his friends' faces. He watched how Jungkook inched closer to Taehyung, the closest to his age, as he tugged at the hem of Taehyung's shirt. Taehyung faced the young boy and smiled, hand moving to ruffle his messy hair in reassurance.

Namjoon was leaning on one of the empty walls with his arms crossed over his chest. He seemed to be calm but he looked like his mind was distant, off somewhere else. His eyebrows lowered for the slightest moment, throat bobbing in his neck. He turned to face Jimin and they shared a look.

Three clean, strong knocks to the door alerted them of another's presence. In walked the doctor along with both Yoongi and Jin. Seokjin hurried to the end of the bed, placing his hand atop Hoseok's ankle, grounding him. And on his face, the warm smile he always wore sat there but now, with a glint of joy, worry, and relief in his eyes.

"I'm glad to see you're awake, Hoseok-ssi. May I have a word with you alone?"

Hoseok nodded, smiling to his friends that spilled out of the room. Each shooting their own silent question to him, asking if he'd be okay alone. After they were all gone, the doctor smiled to him. "Dr. Kim, a pleasure to meet you although I'd have rather met you in other ways. So, how are you feeling? Before we speak, would you like any water?"

"I'm okay, thank you," he replied, scanning the doctor's face for any hesitancy or discomfort. None was found. Dr. Kim looked composed with his strong smile and loose stance, clipboard clad in his hands.

"Alright then let's get this over with. This is our first time treating you at this hospital but according to your friends you attempted suicide? We've already recieved your hospital records as well. Your body weight is concerning as well. I actually know Seokjin-ssi very well and while it's not our usual treatment plan and policy to allow this, we've decided it'd be best for Seokjin to take care of this matter. He's compiled a list of the best psychologists and psychiatrists who can treat you properly. I'll have to ask you to eat more frequently but you're good to go. We'd normally put you through a lengthy process to help you but Seokjin-ssi insisted on taking care of this matter himself. You're completely uninjured as well, which everyone found odd. It's really a miracle. But back on topic, I've also heard that you've been given an offer to live with your friends. I strongly encourage you to do so but otherwise, I have nothing more to say. If you sign here, you can leave anytime you'd like."