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82 (Part 2 of 80)

Namjoon pov

"That's what you did.....namjoon-ah I fell for you" he muttered and left the toilet, leaving me baffled. I don't know what I was feeling, I have hoseok my boyfriend but jin hyung...jin hyung does something to me, my heart thuds and leaps, yearns . I slowly touch my lips, I just cheated on hoseok, my boyfriend, I felt like shit and I don't know what am I getting myself into. I know, I love hoseok but jin hyung? He makes me feel something, but the worst part is I kissed him back... I was traumatized not knowing what to do nor whom to leech on.

"Baby" hoseok's voice chirped along with a strong embrace of his, I hide myself in it and opened my eyes to be met with jin hyung's I was scared, I immediately shut my eyes and pulled hoseok closer to me. "Your hungry joonie?" he muttered, "N-no hobi" I whispered. I felt jin hyung's gaze on me and it made me mewl knowing what I just a few minutes ago and now here I am hiding myself behind hoseok, I don't deserve both of them. "Baby are you okay?" hoseok asked concerned, I don't know whether if I was ok, I just don't know.

"H-hoseok" I stammered, he looked into my orbs confused, cause I didn't declare him as 'hobi'. I shakily took his hands into my palms and placed it on my cheeks, "S-seok g-give me one hard slap, p-please hurt me" I muttered trembling. "Hey baby what- baby what happened to your lips?" he asked running his thumb over my lips, a chocked sob erupted from my lips. "H-hoseok I-i- s-seokjin.." i stammered. "Hey hey shh calm down joonie" he coaxed and rubbed my back. "H-hoseok" i whispered over his shoulders, he hummed softly. "I-i k-kissed jin" i whispered and shut my eyes tightly, waiting for him to slap me hardly across my face but,

"I-i know.." he whispered, i part away and looked into his orbs perplexed. "I-i was in the toilet's stall..h-heard you guys" he whispered. "S-sorry hoseok s-sorry s-sorry" i chanted tremoring, what kind of monster i am? I am hurting two people on the same time, hanging for both of them. Wanting both of them, all to myself. He cupped my cheeks and pressed a firm kiss on my forehead, "Joonie don't lie, do you love jin?" he asked darting into my eyes. "S-seok i-" "Shhh baby, be truthful to yourself, yes or no?" he emphasized. "I-i don't know seok" i admitted whimpering, "Shh baby that's ok, that's fine yea?" he coaxed and lulled me. "W-why aren't y-you mad on me?" i couldn't help but to ask.

"You cant force people to love you, sometimes you have to let go, you know?" he answered.

I uncapped his hands from mine, i felt baffled, like a sinister upon hearing his words, they stabbed my heart like a dagger. He called for me but i ran somewhere, sometimes you need to let go for people you love.

Jin pov

"J-jin you need to go" hoseok namjoon's boyfriend barged to my desk out of nowhere. "Uh?" i asked cluelessly with an irk. "N-namjoon he needs you go!" he muttered, i wasn't a toy to be moved whenever they liked. "No, he is your boyfriend and why should i run after him?" i quivered. "J-jin.." he stammered, i hummed. "H-he told me and...h-he loves you please go after him" he whispered. "H-he told you what?" i stammered. "T-the kiss" he muttered dodging my eyes. "S-sorry, it was me not him" i apologized.

"H-he ran away jin, I don't know I am scared, but I know he needs you...atleast as a bestfriend" hoseok mumbled, "Where did he went?" I asked rising up from my seat. "Rooftop" he muttered, I didn't hesitate nor think twice to run there. I panted as I reached the rooftop, there was no sign of him, atleast not from my vision, I was about to return when a sob rang through my ears, I inhaled and exhaled deeply, I don't know...I just felt jittery, like I am going to meet someone new, perhaps we have spent half of our lives as best friends, I feel like these are my jinx, my fault. Why do I need to fall for him and now ruin his relationship? I just don't know.

Gaining up all of my courage, I walked further to spot him at the edge of the rooftop sitting and sniffling into his palms. The way he was sitting down at the edge was dreading for me. "N-namjoon-ah" I stammered, his sobs stopped for a brief second. "W-why are you here?" he quivered, and rose up from his seat after wiping off his tears. "I could ask you the same..." I muttered, "I wanted to be here so I am here " he muttered, still dodging my eyes. He slung his bag over his shoulder and walked past me, his scent caressing my skin.

I ran and barricaded his path, "I'll talk to hoseok" I mumbled, he looked into my orbs with a little hint of anger. "Talk what?" he mocked. "T-to mend your relationship with him" I muttered. He pushed me by my chest, looking dead into his eyes, "W-why jin w-why!?" he yelled as more tears adorned his cheeks. "What?" I asked. "I h-hate myself...i d-don't know, m-my head hurts, i don't know where to leech on, i d-didn't even know w-who do i actually love" he mumbled helding his head in-between his palms harshly.

"N-no you love hoseok don't confuse yourself" i mumbled, tears already pooling in my eyes. "J-jin help me j-jin please j-just hold me i am s-scared, s-so confused i-" i didn't give him time but pulled him into my chest, a long scream along with sob slips his lips. His palms gripped on my shirt tightly, his teeth chattered, body tremored under me. I had never seen him cry like this, and it breaks my heart as well, knowing i am the cause behind this. Only if i didn't kiss him, these wouldn't have happened.

He started to slump, i pulled him near me and slowly slumped from the wall. "Y-you know what he said ? Y-you cant force p-people to love you s-so let go..." he cried hitting my chest. "T-that's why i'll let you go...go to hoseok" i whispered. He looked dead into my eyes and slapped me, "T-these are all because of you, y-you shouldn't have kissed me, y-you shouldn't have met me!" he yelled. "S-sorry" i stammered. "J-jin...i t-think i love you b-but hoseok...i d-don't know" he cried harder. "You don't have to love me..." i whispered, he looked at me with his misty eyes.

"Y-you don't really have to...." i whispered again, he opened his mouth but buttoned his lips again. "I w-want you" he whispered, "No...hoseok will take care of you better tha-" "I WANT YOU!" he yelled. "You have my whole heart...from the start" i whispered.

"P-please hold me" he whimpered, i wrapped my arms around him and pulled him closer to my chest.

"I will...forever"