The Garden [G.BLYTHE]

[05] PUNISHER

'tears shed for another person are not a sign of weakness. They are a sign of a pure heart'

Nothing could compare to that very moment. Nothing could compare to the sadness in everyone's broken hearts. All dressed in black, they marched through the cold and the snow. It was a particularly freezing morning.

Aurelie stared ahead at Gilbert, who walked beside the minister. She had no words. She felt as if she was an awful person for ignoring him these past few weeks. She felt even more awful for how she first greeted his father when she was given the first task to drop off Gilbert's books.

Gilbert walked with a slouched posture, staring down at the frozen snow, which was almost ice by now. Aurelie could feel the cold air as she breathed in. 

They finally settled in front of the grave. Aurelie looked to her mother, who, as per usual, had her eyes softly closed. Her cheeks were glowing red, as was her nose.

Aurelie pursed her lips, turning to look at the minister, who had begun reading. "Let not your heart be troubled. Ye believe in God, believe also in me. In my father's house are many mansions. If it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and recurve you unto myself..."

The wind blew strongly against Aurelie's cold face. She sniffled away her runny nose. She spared another glance to her mother. Alice was now fighting her own tears, wiping them away with her mitten.

"...for where I am, there ye may be also." Concluded the minister.

Aurelie had been trying this entire time to avoid looking at Gilbert. She knew that it would only makes matters worse. She still did not know how to speak to him. She felt as if she had already failed to speak with him before, so why start now?

However, she could not help herself. As the people who gathered around began making their way to the house for the reception, Aurelie stepped forward towards him.

He hadn't noticed her yet, and instead went to sit at the bench by the grave. Aurelie was hesitant, though she almost felt obligated to join him.

She took a seat beside him, on the complete other end of the bench. As snow started to fall, she stared ahead, wishing it weren't so cold. Gilbert did not acknowledge her presence, but she could tell he knew she was there.

Aurelie sighed, staring at her breath mixed with the cold air that appeared in front of her. She held her hand over her nose and exhaled once more to warm it.

Gilbert continued to look down at the grave, occasionally fiddling with his black hat in his hands.

Aurelie took in a deep breath. She moved slightly closer to the boy. Only slightly. She did so just in case he had forgotten that she was there. She noticed a small snowflake land on her eyelash.

"I hate when they say that this was all planned by God." She finally spoke. Gilbert still didn't turn to look at her, but he listened. Aurelie couldn't bring herself to look at him either. She continued to stare off into the distance.

"Why do we worship a being that kills innocent people? A punisher." She scoffed. "And we claim that everything happens for a reason. Boy, am I glad that my father's death led me to achieve such great things." She remarked sarcastically. "I would give anything for him to be back."

Gilbert let out a small sigh. He appeared to be holding back tears, which Aurelie could notice just from hearing it.

"I'm sorry I've been avoiding you. I admit, I get worried that when I get too close to someone, I'll lose them." She admitted. "It's stupid." She chuckled to herself.  "And to be honest, you're quite annoying." She joked.

Gilbert still remained silent, which only made her more nervous. 

She sighed. "Sorry. Not the time, I suppose. It gets easier. It does." She sniffled, staring down at her boots. "It...It takes time but it does."

"I'm sorry. I must be awful at comforting. I'm trying." Aurelie found herself crying as well. Staring at Mr. Blythe's grave only brought back bitter memories.

"Well...uh." She made sure to look even further to the side so that if Gilbert were to decide to look at her, he wouldn't see her cry. "I better be off now." She stood up. "It all feels unreal right now, I-I know, but...well if I'm being honest, I have no way to explain the feeling in words. I...I suppose you'll have to see for yourself."

And with that, Aurelie made her way to the reception. She was relieved to be away from the cold, but part of her was left even colder after speaking with Gilbert, or more accurately, speaking to the silent Gilbert. She wondered if he even listened, or if it even helped. Maybe she made it all worse. She hoped she hadn't.

She took a seat beside her mother, leaning her head down on the woman's shoulder. "Where were you?" Inquired Alice silently. 

"I fell behind." Responded Aurelie.

Aurelie must have stared out the window for fifteen minutes before she noticed Gilbert make his way towards the house. He paused for a moment. She could tell he was hesitant to go inside.

She remembered how awful it felt at her father's funeral. Once she and her mother arrived at the reception, the amount of condolences she received only made her feel worse.

Gilbert's eyes averted to the window, causing the two to lock eyes for a moment. Aurelie froze in panic. Gilbert didn't move either. He stood in place for a bit, then looked back down at the snow.

Aurelie's lips remained slightly parted. She sighed, her breath fogging up the window. After a moment of consideration, Gilbert spun back around to walk in the other direction.

Aurelie watched him until she couldn't anymore. When he was out of sight, she sat back down until she and her mother went back home.

She could not imagine how Gilbert must have felt. Of course, she had also lost her father, though she still had her mother. She could simply not imagine what it were like for Gilbert now that he had no one.