The Spark Between Us

Chapter 14 - Moving on

Everything moves on, whether you are ready or not. In the two weeks since Mimi's passing, I have gone back to working my 2-3 days at week at the lake. I finally spoke with Sara, as she wouldn't give up calling until she heard my voice. She will be back today and I am positive I will see her. I spoke with Noah as well , about a week ago, that didn't go as smoothly as the one with Sara. Replaying the conversation in my mind, I flinch a little.

I was sitting on my bed cross legged, staring at the wall, trying to shake myself out of the funk I had been in since Mimi's death.
My phone rang, the caller id said Noah. I almost didn't answer it, he had called a few times since the last time we spoke, when he informed me he wasn't coming home. Usually Asher would run interference for me and answer, but he had gone back home, he couldn't stay here with me forever.

Sighing, I answer. " Hello?"

"Maine, love I'm surprised to hear your voice. I have been trying to get ahold of you, but I only ever get Asher when I call." His tone sounds relieved, but I detect an undertone of frustration.

" Well, you got me this time. What's up?" I reply, not really wanting to speak to him, still mad at him for abandoning me in my time of need.

" Just  calling to check in on you, see how your doing. Do I need a reason to call my girlfriend?" His voice is teasing.

I am not in the mood for his teasing. My mind replays everything, how devastated I was about Mimi and him choosing to stay away. The suffocating feeling I kept having before he left, with his set in stone plans for the future. Guess Mimi up and dying didn't fit into those plans, huh? My mind mocks at me. I feel something inside me harden.

" About that, Noah. I am going through a lot, things are changing and I don't know what the future holds right now. I do know that I deserve and need more than you can offer me right now. I think it best that we take a break. I need space and time to figure things out."

He snorts, unpleasantly " Space and time to figure things out?  You're still upset that I couldn't come home to be with you. Never mind that I would blow a huge opportunity, if I did that, right?"

I am a little taken back with his tone, I have never heard Noah speak to anyone like that, let alone me. Another part of me doesn't really care, at least not right now. " It is more than just being upset about you not coming home. We have talked about some of it before. I was already feeling uncomfortable with things before you left, but yes, you not coming home didn't help."

" And this has nothing to do with Asher, hmm?" He asks, his tone mocking. " Because I'm aware of how close you two have become, especially recently. He stayed the night with you multiple nights."

Anger flashes through me, causing my temper to boil over and I retort " Did I say this had anything to do with Asher? Yes, he has helped me lately, I actually don't know what I would have done with out him, which is more than I can say for you! I don't appreciate what you are implying with your comments. He stayed so I wouldn't be alone, not for what you are thinking!"

His voice immediately became contrite
"I know that Maine, and I am sorry I implied otherwise. I am just frustrated that I cannot be the one there for you when you need me. I love you and I really am very sorry. Forgive me?"

I stand my ground. " I forgive you for what you said, Noah, but I meant what I said as well. I need time and space to figure out how I am feeling and sort things out."

He sounds so dejected when he answers. " I understand."

I soften my earlier words by telling him " We can see where things are when you come back, okay?"