The Truth About Friendships

16. Admiration

The weekends have begun to feel like seconds. One minute you're partying, the next minute you're at a desk, painting, sketching, or sculpting clay. I've spent the majority of my time with Ren and his friends, getting to know Danny more. He's a predictable guy, and beyond nice. Total opposite of his friend. He's a very energetic person; he always wants to do something.

When I'm not spending time with them, I'm creating art. We haven't done a huge project in a while, so I'm ready to start on something again. I get excited at the idea of going back and doing new things. I heard this week that we were going to start painting this week.

I absolutely loved painting. Something about it just made me feel safe. It was like my comfort zone. Painting made me feel like I could be myself.

When I arrive at class early, I set things up and enjoy a little time alone. I pull out my canvas and mix my paint to make a particular color. Brown. A rich, warm-colored brown. Most people would look at the color and think it's ugly, but brown is one of the most beautiful and unique colors ever.

I began gently tracing my paintbrush on the canvas, just enough for it to show up. I concentrated hard on what I wanted to do and how I wanted to create it. Even though the class was about to start in 5 minutes, I did not rush myself. I could even hear all the students coming in, whispering about what I was doing, but I didn't care.

I felt someone sitting beside me, causing me to snap back to reality.

It was Ren.

I peeked at him to see what he was doing, and surprisingly, he had all of his art supplies and canvases like everyone else. Was he prepared? Did he enjoy painting as well?

My head snapped back to the teacher when he started giving instructions about today's project.

"I see you came prepared," I whispered to him with a smile.

"I should be saying that to you." He joked.

"This will be your last project until fall break. You are to create something that you fear. Think about what haunts you the most, and portray that on the canvas. It should be completed when you return after the break." Professor Broderick explained.

What haunts me the most? As in a nightmare or something? I looked around to see if the other students had some trouble figuring it out as well, but I could see all of them getting started. Including Ren. Once again, I peeked over at his canvas and tried to see what he was creating.

There was something gentle about his aura today. Even though he hadn't spoken a word, I felt like I could feel everything he was thinking. Ren's usual appearance was very dark and intimidating. But as I watched him gently handle a paintbrush, he looked light and sensitive. It's almost like a new person.

I watched the dullness he usually had in his eyes soften, and his lips parted slightly as soon as the paintbrush hit the canvas. I noticed the way a piece of his hair fell right over his brow. But that didn't bother him. His eyes were focused as if he was only concentrating on his work. He was a pretty person. A beautiful person. Despite how he acts daily, it seems his heart softens when he paints.

"Miss Jones, have you started yet?" My Professor called me out.

"N-No, sir." I shook my head in embarrassment.

"Well, the canvas won't paint itself." He motioned for me to start working.

I still don't know what I'm doing. What haunts me the most? It would be... a one-sided love. That feeling is the worst in the world. When someone knows you're in love with them, they have a choice whether to reciprocate those feelings back. A one-sided love. Falling in love with someone can either hurt you or heal you. There's no in-between.