ᴡʜɪᴛᴇ ʟɪᴇꜱ ✔️

EIGHTEEN

Just stop talking.

"Vee I know this is hard to process but I'm there for you okay? We will get through this together."

Stop talking.

"Now the funeral will be a week on Tuesday and the arrangements have been made for the wak-"

"OH MY GOD! WILL YOU JUST STOP TALKING!" You turn and run to your room.

Scarlett stops mid sentence stunned at your outburst. You'd just been told your gramps had died so you were still trying to process the news. You couldn't quite understand how Scarlett was keeping it together so well. You and yours gramps were so unbelievably close. You used to spend every summer vacation with him. You did everything together. The bond you and him held was something very special, something Scarlett and the rest of the family never had with that man. You felt like a huge part of your heart had been ripped out. You didn't cry though...you couldn't. You just felt sick. You didn't know how to process the news. Well there was one thing. That thing in the back of your mind. The thing that's always on your mind.

Hours passed, you just sat there on your bed looking at the wall trying to wrap your head around the news. It was no good. The string of condolences texts had started flooding in. You couldn't bring yourself to read them. The last ping on your phone made you look though.

Ffs.

Sebastian:
Vee I've just heard the news. I'm so sorry I knew how close you and your gramps were.

As much as you couldn't stand the guy it was nice seeing that someone was acknowledging how close you were to him.

*sigh*

Vee:
Thanks Seb. Means a lot.

Sebastian:
❤️

Vee:
❤️

**7pm**

You decide to head downstairs to join Chris and Scarlett. As soon as you entered the room they stood coming towards you.

"Guys relax it's okay. I'm okay. I'm just in shock."

They both look at you sadness in their eyes. They both pull you in embracing you in a 3 way hug. It felt nice. After a moment you pulled away.

"So... who wants pizza?"  You say with a fake grin.

"I'll order" Chris responds.

30 minutes later the pizzas arrive. You all sit there in the living room watching telly occasionally laughing. You really wish you weren't there. All you wanted was for this feeling to go away but it wouldn't. You knew what would fix it though. That just made you feel worse. One small inconvenience and you wanted drugs. You were really starting to hate yourself again, which just added to the urge. You didn't know what to do. Right now in this moment you had to make a decision.

Fight or flight?

****

Flight. That's what you chose. You didn't want to fight yourself anymore, it was too hard. You didn't want to fight it for Scarlett and Chris anymore. What was the point. Life is meaningless. You're born, you make choices whether good or bad and you still die. So what was the point in trying to be good. Being good gets your nowhere. Anyways you knew you were the disappointment of the family. The disappointment of the group. You figured you might as well live up to the reputation.

It's around 9pm, you get up from the couch and disappear upstairs only to reappear 10 minutes later, shoes on, bag and keys in hand.

"I'm going for a drive, don't wait up."

"Okay sweetie drive safe." Scarlett responds.

You're heading down the hallway and you feel a hand wrap around your wrist pulling you round. It's Chris, he looks deep into your eyes.

"Vee are you okay?" He says in a low husky tone. He knows somethings up.

"Yeah I just think a drive will do me some good. You know, clear my head."

" I can come with you?"

"No. Sorry I mean it's just I need some alone time."

"Only if you're sure sweetheart." He says pulling you in kissing your forehead.

"I'm sure." You flash a fake smile before Chris pulls you in gently planting a soft kiss on your lips. This makes you smile for real.

"Stay safe princess." He says allowing you to leave.

You get outside and tears begin forming, then running down your face. You know what's about to happen is wrong but you just can't fight it anymore.

"Oh Chris I'm so so sorry" you whisper to yourself grabbing your mouth not allowing the sob to escape you. You get in the car and drive. You're body goes into autopilot and the next thing you know you've arrived at your destination.

491 Grange Drive.

Authors note: Do we know where Vee is? Will she crack it will she pull herself back?