Chapter 281

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Matt's POV: After getting in Hermann's van, I sighed as I went to put my mask on and just set my bag down. Leaning back in my seat, I just groaned and shook my head. Driving away from the house, Cindy looked at me and just knew something was wrong. "Okay, can I speak to you as your friend and former landlord now Matt?" I nodded when she said that. "Sure thing. What's up?" Cindy then sighed. "What's bothering you?" I then sighed and just shook my head. "A lot." Hermann decided to speak to me too. "Want to talk about it?" 

I sighed and thought about it. "I just had to discipline my first firefighter...who just so happens to also be my best friend, and the man I was going to have as my best man if we would've had a real wedding." Cindy sighed when I said that. "Yikes, that's hard." I nodded when she said that. "I suspended him for a shift and demoted him." Hermann was shocked when I said that. "Wow, that's a bold move for being a new chief." I nodded and agreed with him. "He needs to understand that I have authority over him. I am Boden now."

Hermann nodded when I said that. "You know what I mean by that right? I mean, nobody can replace him but...I have kinda replaced him in the role of Chief and Severide needs to learn to respect that when we are on shift, I am not his best friend...I am there to make sure that he goes home safe to his family. Believe me when I say that Cindy, that is my first concern at every fire that we dealt with today. By the way Hermann, I want you to monitor your health after every shift from now on. If you feel bad...I want you to quarantine."

Cindy looked at me when I said that. "You mean COVID?" I nodded and sighed. "I know you would do it because you have kids but...I can't be exposed either. I have twins on the way and a young son." Cindy then sighed. "By the way, I am so sorry about that. We heard through the grapevines and I think you told us." I nodded when she said that. "She watched that video you sent us the first time around. By the way, I don't think I've ever said this Cindy but...I am so sorry that you guys had to go through that. I understand how hard it is."

Hermann agreed with me when I said that. "You do don't you?" I nodded. "And I had it worse than you because it's happened to me twice now." Cindy nodded. "I lost three actually so, you can't say that." I then sighed. "Not that it's a competition but...Gabby is still carrying our unborn child." Cindy was shocked when I said that. "What? How is that possible?" I sighed. "They said it's unsafe to do the operation because we only lost one baby. We still have twins in there."

I then teared up a bit. "To have to touch her stomach and feel where there was once a baby kicking, that is still in there but dead...that is hard on a daily basis." Hermann then turned around and grabbed my hand. "Hey, we are all here for you guys. I am sorry to say this Cindy but, I have to agree with Matt...you didn't have to carry any of them while still being pregnant." I nodded when he said that. "It's hard on her. She doesn't talk about it but...it's hard on both of us. I am just holding our family together as much as possible."

Cindy agreed with me when I said that. "Just make sure that you take time to mourn yourself. Matt, you can't always be the strong one." I nodded when she said that. "Believe me, I am. I am just mourning a lot right now. At the same time, I am trying to also keep my men safe. I feel like I failed a bit today. I am just going over some of the calls and keep wondering if I did something wrong." Hermann shook his head when I said that. "Hey, don't you dare think that way Chief." I agreed with him and sighed.

Hermann then looked at me again and smiled. "Boden would be proud of you. Matt, I doubt he could've ever taken charge of 3 shifts at once. You did it easily and made it work." I nodded and agreed with him, tearing up a bit. "God, I need to be strong...not weak." Cindy shook her head. "Matt, just take a breather and grieve all you want. People will understand. By the way, I loved your eulogy at the funeral." Turning onto my street, I smiled. "How did you get my address, I didn't give it to you?" Cindy then smiled. "I texted Gabby to get it ahead of time."

I smiled when she said that. "Well, thanks again. Now listen, I need to get going because there is a little boy already waiting for me on the front steps." She agreed with me and laughed. "Do you mind if I come out and see Louie?" I sighed and looked at her. "I'm sorry Cindy but under the current circumstances and with you guys having 5 kids...it's not a risk I want to take." Cindy understood. "Right, of course. Have a good day Matt." I smiled and then went to get out. Walking around the van, I went to look at Louie as he ran over to me. "Daddy!" 

I smiled at him and went to pick him up. Kissing his head, I looked at him when I saw Gabby at the door. "He was so excited for you to come home." I nodded and smiled. "I need to go take a shower and get changed. Antonio here?" Gabby nodded and smiled. "Come inside first. I made you some food." I nodded and agreed. "I already took a hazmat shower at the house so, that's good." Gabby nodded and agreed with me when I said that, watching me walk into the house.

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