Why do you let your brain endless talk
Endlessly say shit we all know isn't true
Why do you let the smallest things
Lead to such bad mental states
Two days in row you did it
And both days the day after
She tells me why you're wrong
This overwhelming feeling
That they don't want me in the VC with them
And two days in a row
"I was thinking about you"
"I wish you had been there"
And yet as I stare at our DMs
Seeing you all in a call together
I just can't convince myself to join
It's one button to set my fears aside
One button to hear that voice
One button to be showered with her praise
She'd be so happy to see you fuck head
It was literally her birthday
And you were once again
So caught up in your own head
That you didn't let yourself join
And you know if you texted her
She'd beg you to join
She'd get you in that call
Just like the day she pulled you out of bed
Just to play with her
You know she'd do it
She'd give you those words you need
She's always there when you doubt yourself
And the fact that you rely on her bothers your
And last night as you laid in bed crying
You swore we weren't doing this anymore
You swore we were getting over her
You swore you were gonna put space
And then you wake up with a text from her
And it's all over
And text her and her personally
You don't keep it in the group chat like you should
You let her remain a fantasy in your mind
For the love of God she's straight
You know there's no chance
You know there's no magic way to convert her
You know it
I know it
Everyone knows it
So why don't you just let yourself get over it?
Why do you keep doing what you're doing?
You just keep thinking if we give her time
If we just keep showing her over and over again
You single her out
You do things you wouldn't for the others
You're signing yourself up for failure
And so we sit here crying
Wishing any of these words meant anything
Listening to music with her
Just going further down the path
At least you don't take it out on her
Like you did to all the others
You kept it hidden in those letters
Those letters you just keep filling
With things you never want her to read
You never want her to know
She said she'd never hurt you
Never break your heart
And she didn't lie to you, dumbass
She's done nothing
You did this to yourself
Just like you always do
