From Then Till Now: A Jamaican Love Story Book 2

Chapter 6

Alex's POV

Monday 11:00 PM

I've been lying in bed looking at the ceiling for a few hours now. Shanya left hours ago, and I can't sleep. The house is lonely, everything reminds me of her.

I can feel her slipping away from me and I am helpless. We are no longer on the same wavelength; we've never been this out of sync before.

I can't lose Nya; I am nothing without her. I don't even feel upset over what she did anymore. I just want us to get past this and start loving each other properly.

Shanya thinks I was trying to get her to submit to me but that wasn't my intention. My ego got in the way of my logical thoughts. I wanted to prove the baller wrong, I'm Shanya's best.

I fucked up and broke my promise to her. I told her that I would never leave her but at the first sign of trouble I ran.

Deep down I know that she's not going to forgive me. I finally got her and now I've lost her before I could fully express my love to her.

Shanya's POV

For someone who never has trouble sleeping, I'm struggling tonight. Sleep just won't come, and I'm frustrated. My mind is filled with thoughts of Alex.

I'm angry with him but I want to be near him. I want to go home to him, but I keep remembering the weeks of hurt he put me through.

If Alex can leave me at my lowest, how can I trust him to do right by me? Men have always failed me and for once I thought I found one that I was sure would never fail me.

All my insecurities and fears are at the surface, I need to get them under control. Since meeting Alex my demons have not reared their ugly heads. Alex made me feel safe and the self-doubt was slowly leaving me.

He made me feel sexy and desirable. He gave me his attention even when I didn't want it. As intense as he is I don't mind it. I would've forgiven him for the rough sex because I didn't hate it.

I hated how he left and ignored me as if I meant nothing to him. That is what I'm struggling to forgive him for.

Alex's POV

Tuesday 4:30 PM

I can't function, I've tried calling Shanya and she hasn't answered or returned any of my calls. I feel like I'm going crazy, I haven't slept since Sunday, I can barely eat and everything and everyone annoys me.

I've been confined to the living room because the bedroom reminds me so much of her and I can't bear to be in there. This is the reason I've never brought a woman to my bedroom.

Shanya's Chat

Me: Are you coming home today?

Shanya: I'm already home.

Me: I meant here.

Shanya: No

Me: Ok

That comment cut deep since I consider this our home; it hurts that she no longer thinks of it as her home.

The phone feels heavy in my hand like how my heart feels. I take the phone and hurl it across the room, it connects with the tv.

"Boss?" I turn to see Jubba standing at the entrance to the living room looking at me.

Like why is he here? I'm not in the mood to deal with anyone right now. "Don't you have work to do?" I snap at him.