Just love me

TEA

Meanwhile, outside :
You have calmed down a bit, but you still do not want to talk to Payton.
When you get to the back of the boat, you see a bench, so you decide to sit down for a bit.
Payton stands and leans against the fence in front of you.
After a while, you finally decide to talk to him.
You : « it's Matt... »
Payton : « yeah, I know.. »
You look at him.
You : « he cheated on me and broke up with me » tears in your eyes, but also anger.
Payton : « oh.. »
You : « arghh, why am I like this ? » wiping your tears.
Payton : « because you love him, I guess »
You : « ... »
Payton : « and it's okay, you can't just forget him like that, ...even after what he did »
You : « I'm so stupid Payton... » looking at him.
Payton : « nah you're not, you couldn't know »
You do not say anything.
Payton : « you just need time, it just happened and it's a lot for you rn, but it's gonna be okay »
You look at him, then look down again.
You : « can we know why you're the one helping me with my heartache, even ? » laughing a bit, tears in your eyes.
Payton : « and why not ? » smiling a bit.
You : « yeah.. I'm talking nonsense, sorry » shaking your head, frowning and smiling a bit.
Payton : « well, at least you're smiling »
You : « yeah... I don't even know why » losing your smile.
Payton : « because I'm here » 😌
You : « shut up.. » with a little smile.
Payton : « k good atmosphere »

You guys keep talking, he makes you laugh a bit and forget about all that shit for a while.
But then, it starts to get really late.
Payton : « well, are you planning to stay here all night ? »
You : « maybe, yeah.. »
You : « but you can go »
Payton : « sure »
You : « no but fr, I'm fine »
Payton : « she says that and then goes to jump off the boat »
You : « I'm not- » laughing a bit.
Payton : « and I'm not gonna play Titanic, I'm telling you »
You : « can you stop ? » smiling a bit.
Payton : « yeah come on, let's go back inside » holding out his hands to you.
You grab them and he helps you up.
You : « oh no, do the others know ? »
Payton : « idk, ask Talia, but I don't think so »

You take your phone and call Talia.
You : « Talia, tell me you didn't tell the others ? »
Talia : « omg y/n, are you okay ? »
You : « yeah, I'm.. okay »
Talia : « only Cynthia knows, because she was with me outside, that's all. But where are you now ? »
You : « I'm with Payton, we're not far away anymore »
Talia : « okay, let me know when you're there »
You : « Talia, I think I'm just gonna go to bed actually »
Talia : « oh yeah.. okay, do you want me to come with you ? »
You : « no it's okay, dw »
Talia : « sure ? »
You : « yeah »
Talia : « well, gn then.. »
You : « gn »
You hang up.

Payton : « so ? »
You : « it's okay, they didn't say anything »
Payton : « and will you do it ? »
You : « no, I don't feel like talking to them rn »
Payton : « I understand. You don't have to tell them, but I think they'll notice »
You : « ugh..- »
Payton : « eh, nah okay sorry, dw about that. You'll see later, huh ? »
You : « yeah... I just want to go to bed rn »
Payton : « well, let's go »

You arrive in front of your room, and stand there for a few seconds without saying anything. You are both a little embarrassed.
Payton : « well.. it's gonna be okay ? »
You : « I guess »
Payton : « k.. I leave you then, gn »
You : « gn.. » looking away then down.
He starts to leave.
You : « eh- um.. »
He turns around.
Payton : « what ? »
You : « wouldn't you want to stay ? » looking at him.
You : « I don't wanna be alone... »
Payton : « um yeah, ...okay, I'll stay »
You : « ..thanks »

So you guys go into your room. You go take a quick shower, and put on your pajamas. Then you lie down in bed. Payton sits next to you and leans against the headboard.
You guys talk for a while because you can not sleep. He takes your mind off things, but you start to get a little tired.
You : « Payton ?.. »
He looks at you.
You : « thanks for staying » head on your pillow, looking away.
Payton : « thank you for asking me » removing a lock of hair from your face.
You think two seconds, then look at him.
You : « Payton.. » straightening up a bit, facing him.
Payton : « I mean, I- »
You look at his lips then suddenly grab his neck and kiss him hard, without thinking. He grabs your head and kisses you back. You feel shivers running through your body.

But suddenly, Payton stops kissing you, leaving his forehead stuck to yours and his hand on your cheek.
Payton : « y/n, wait.. »
You : « omg I'm sorry » moving away from him, super embarrassed.
You : « fuck.. what the hell am I doing ? » totally lost.
He is looking at you, lost too.
You : « I'm sorry... »
Payton : « you're sorry ? »
You : « I- »
Payton : « why did you do that ? »
You : « idk... » lost.
Payton : « ...I'm gonna go » getting up.
You : « Payton, don't go » feeling bad and blaming yourself.
He leaves the room.

Alone :
You : « fuck. » mad at yourself.
You : « ugh, what's wrong with me ?? »
You are basically in this mood :

You calm down a bit but you are overwhelmed by your thoughts. You feel totally lost.
You grab your phone. You want to text Payton but you do not even know what to say, so you throw it on your bed and go into the bathroom. You look at yourself in the mirror, then splash some water on your face.
After that, you go back to your bed and try to forget what happened.

On Payton's side :
He goes to his room. He is a little shocked by what you did and angry at himself but also at you.
He is wondering why you kissed him, and if you are really sorry. But he is especially wondering why he reacted the way he did.