Lacuna

36 | Worth living

Esme

After returning home from Italy, it took some time for us all to settle back into our lives here in LA., but we have, and it's been amazing. Everyone, if possible, has become closer than before.

Silas and I host dinner at ours every Sunday, and we watch a movie after. It has been sixteen years since I last felt this secure with my life and myself, and it's a feeling I never want to go away.

Transitioning from Chem student to interior student wasn't as easy as I thought, but having Silas in my corner- always ready to help me- made it a lot easier. These past six months knowing him have felt like a lifetime, and everyday I fall in love with something new. He truly makes life worth living.

I started therapy soon after we were home, and I have never cried more to a stranger than I have to my therapist, Dr. Jenkins. Silas thoroughly checked her background, and after finding no red flags, she has helped me find healthy ways to work through my childhood trauma, my abduction trauma, as well helping me to not overthink as much. I'm forever indebted to her.

The GPS in my car reminds me of my surroundings, and I hurriedly take the exit off the highway. In my peripheral, I see the side eye Genesis sends my way, and I mutter, "Sorry."

"I thought you said Debby has helped you to not be in your thoughts as much." She says, referring to Dr. Jenkins, and I roll my eyes.

"She has helped me with that, and I wasn't overthinking, I was simply thinking." Gen hums, and I can tell she doesn't believe me one hundred percent, but I don't pay her any mind.

Genesis and I are driving over to Delilah's to check up on her- she sent a semi alarming text this morning that she was having Braxton-Hicks contractions. Both of them are fastly approaching their due dates, and the anticipation is killing me.

Turning into Delilah's driveway, I pass by two bowls- one filled with cat food and the other water- and shake my head to myself.

"Is she still trying to catch that cat?" Genesis question knowingly, and I hum.

Delilah has been trying to catch a homeless kitten since she moved into this house, and I admire her for being so patient.

I don't have the heart to tell a heavily pregnant woman that the cat she wants, probably doesn't want her.

I raise my fist to knock on the door, but Dee opens it before I have the chance to. Her very low, very wide belly greets me before she does, and I internally laugh.

Delilah holds the door open for us to come in, and when I hug her, I have to do it sideways. Genesis doesn't even bother, but sends her an air kiss.

"How are you feeling?' I ask, taking my shoes off, and when she doesn't answer, I look over my shoulder at her.

Dee holds her stomach with pain written all over her face, and I switch my gaze to Gen for help. She shrugs her shoulders, clearly not knowing what to do.

"I feel amazing." She finally answers as if the past thirty seconds hasn't happened. "Now, what I really wanted you two to come over for is so you can help me finish putting away Yris's things."

Walking through the house to the nursery, I smile proudly at my work. Delilah expressed to me once she was the official owner of the house, that she wanted me to step into the role as Interior Decorator.

I knocked down two birds with one stone. Decorating this house for her was one of her push presents from me. Delilah has been through so much, and I know that this is hard for her. She's not doing this alone, but is at the same time. Plus, I've completed my final project two years early, and that makes me feel on top of the world.

Entering the nursery, Genesis and Delilah are both sitting on the day bed, while I'm sat on the - criss cross apple sauce- facing them.

A pink bin overflowing with Yris's clothes sits in the corner of the room, catches my eye, and Delilah points to it.

"So, I had my checkup on Tuesday, and I'm officially nine months today. My OB wants me to go the whole 40 weeks for some reason, but I don't think she'll sit tight for that long, and I have too much to do." My eyebrows furrow in confusion at the information I've been given for two reasons. One, because she has always been an overly prepared person, and I'll bet these clothes are the last things she has left to do. Two, because I don't think keeping the baby inside until forty weeks is a good idea. Especially since she is already having some kind of contractions.

"If my doctor told me to keep this baby in for the entire 40 weeks, I would actually kill her." Genesis adds, and Dee and I side eye one another.

She is not having the best pregnant experience.

"Gen, he'll be here soon and it'll all be worth it." Delilah says, offering her support, but Genesis nods unconvinced. The woman is eight months pregnant and uncomfortable, of course simple words aren't going to help.

Taking off my coat, I move over to the bin of clothes, and ask, "Where am I putting them once I've folded them?' She points behind me at the antique dresser I sourced for her, and goes back to clutching her stomach in pain.

...

After we finished folding and putting away the clothes, Gen and I moved down stairs towards the smell of something delicious.

    Delilah sits at the dining table with a pleased smile on her face, and gestures for us to sit down. The many boxes of different Asian foods spread across the table causes my stomach to grumble. I pull Gen's seat out for her, then do the same for myself.

The sound of forks on glass fills the dining room, but Delilah breaks the silence. "I'm having my baby shower on Sunday." I place my shrimp back down on my plate and stare at my best friend.

"Why were we not informed about this earlier?" Genesis asks, in a surprisingly calm tone.

Dee shrugs with an unsure look. "Because after my appointment, I realized how little time left I have with her inside me. That makes me sad, so I want to combat that with a party." I understand her thought process- no surprise there, we basically share the same brain- but I am worried the pressure of planning the shower will cause her to go into labor.

"Is everything planned?" I ask her, and she points to her phone with her chopsticks.

"I sent Mindy everything I liked on Pinterest, and I hope I love how she brings it together." Once again, I place down my food, and stare blankly at her.

If she told Mindy, she must have already told Monet and Lewis. If she didn't, well then I can't imagine Mindy not calling to confirm her best friend since highschool daughter's pregnancy.

"Mae, calm down.  Invited them over for tea last week, and told them everything. Of course leaving out certain parts." She makes a pew pew motion with her hands, and I laugh. "Me and Theya talked through a lot with them, and they're both invited to their granddaughters shower."

It makes me feel good to know that they were able to work through everything, and gives me hope that Genesis and I too can do the same with our parents.