RIGHT IN THE FEELS (a compilation)

Mad

"Shot dead... some were gutted... lots of blood... one's missing a heart..."

Oh, heavens. I bit my lip and mirrored the horror behind the officer's eyes. A single tear tainted my left cheek before I nod when they asked me to come with them at the station.

I replayed last night as I watch the 'burbs gone by at the back of the officer's car.

"You were going to tell me about your scars," he whispered gently, reminding me of his previous question I failed to answer.

I pondered for a while, letting myself wander back to those days... those nights...

"They told me they were doing it for my own good," my voice cracked a little at the end, "and that it's supposed to be that way. It's supposed to be tough, to toughen me up."

I slowly run my hand through his broad chest, feeling each muscle tighten beneath my touch. He sighed before kissing the side of my head, and then held my jaw to make me look straight into his eyes.

"I need a name, darling."

I know I whispered one name last night, I thought as I sat in front of an officer's desk, before he disappeared when I succumbed to slumber.

I didn't even have to be asked for an alibi, as all of it happened just a few hours before they found me at home, in a state almost half a day away from that damned house.

But all of them were killed. Gone. All of them.

And he did it. After I told him one name. Is he aiming to be the deathnote or something? I know, it's not the time for my fucked up jokes, but this right here is the best one yet.

How could he kill them? How could he?

"Hey," his familiar voice thrusted me out of my reverie, and there he stood in front of me in his favorite black suit. It didn't even occur to me how long I've spent spacing out in this godforsaken station.

"Hey?" I whispered in disbelief. "That's the first thing you'd say to me? After what you just did? How could you do that?"

Anger rose within me when I look at his almost vacant eyes. Almost, since I can see there's curiosity in there as well.

"You didn't wish for them to be dead?" he whispered back after dragging me in an empty corridor.

I started laughing. Silently, but hard. I laughed so much my eyes welled up fresh tears.

"You..." I looked at him again and saw that he never took his eyes off me. "I did not ask you to do that! I did not tell you to kill them! You wiped their entire fucking name off the face of the earth, and I never told you to do that!"

He kept on staring at me blankly as I try to catch my own damn breath. It's just too much. The feeling is too wild. Too intense it's overflowing. I cannot believe him sometimes.

"I did not tell you the story behind my scars to avenge me, you arrogant ass," I spat, still feeling irked. "How fucking dare you take away their lives? They're mine to take, not yours! I don't need you killing for me, I can do that on my own, thank you very much!"

His easy smirk appeared at the same time his eyes twinkled in veneration. He stepped once in front of me and took my right hand, raising it to kiss the back of my palm before swiftly kissing the rest of my knuckles.

"Apologies for my rather rash actions, darling." He whispered, locking eyes with mine as he keep his mouth near my knuckles. "I'd always be honoured to keep your troubles away, but you're right. They were yours to take and I've taken that from you. For that, I am sorry."

I raised an eyebrow before taking my hand from him to wipe remaining tear stains off my cheeks.

"I'm still pissed. You know I hate being dragged off our bed before noon," my eyes rolled on their own accord, "and, my love? Next time you do fun activities without me, I'd kick your ass off our bedroom until you bring me one of your previous lovers' still beating heart."

At that, he chuckled. "Well, that's easy."

It sure is actually, been there, done that.

"Now if you'd let me escort you out of this wretched place," he cooed as he reached for my hand and placed it on his arm, "an open heart is waiting for you in the car. I'll take note of the still beating one next time though."

I chortled at his crazy ass. He really just went to get me in the station with an evidence in tow, didn't he? Oh, how I love his madness. My madman.