one-hundred & ten.

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* Content warning for heavy alcohol use and mentions of depression.

"Thank you," I whispered and swiped my fifth flute of champagne in half an hour, thanking the server who had been doing his rounds through the function room all evening.

After Tiff and I left the bathroom, the pity party that I had been trying to avoid all night was in full swing and Tom had joined me in my misery. We'd found a quiet corner away from the crowd and I had managed to down enough champagne to suppress the urge to catch a cab home after being accused of bringing shame to my closest friends by Liv. I didn't give a fuck anymore about what anyone thought of me because in reality, they'd already made their mind up so why should I pretend to be anything but a mess?

On top of that, the anxiety from someone other than Marcus and Tiff knowing about the threats I'd been receiving on Instagram had also made me want to run for the hill but alas, the alcohol surging through my bloodstream was easing the tension. Thankfully Tom had his head screwed on straight enough to know that I'd had way too much to drink and was closely monitoring how messy I was getting.

"That's your last one," Tom said as I sculled the bubbling champagne and looked up at him with glassy eyes, ignoring his warnings with a hiccup.

I shook my head, "Don't tell me what to do," I slurred, waving over at the server who nodded towards me and passed me another drink, "I love you" I said loudly, grasping the waiters arm with gratitude before Tom pulled me away and apologised to the young man for my behaviour.

"I know you're miserable and you have every right to be upset but think about Bonti. You don't want to embarrass him," Tom stated quietly, making me scoff and laugh out loud.

"He's the idiot who fucking proposed to me, which is embarrassing enough. I'm a walking punch line at this point and it's about time he realised that he deserves better than a washed up, drug addicted slut," I spat, accidentally knocking over the empty glasses beside me and fumbling to pick them back up with blurry eyes.

"Fuck!" I shouted as Tom quickly stood up in front of me, slapping my hands away from the shards of glass so I didn't cut myself while also shielding me from prying eyes.

"Don't touch it, I've got it," Tom whispered as a waiter hurried over and helped clear up the mess while my intoxicated body slumped back against the wall, head spinning and eyes closed.

A third voice joining Tom and the waiter caught my attention, my eyes fluttering open to see the outline of a tall, long-haired brunette looking down at me with a concerned gaze. His brown eyes were flicking between my slumped body and Tom's equally worried stare and I couldn't help but scoff at how dramatic they were being. In hindsight, they were just the right amount of worried considering how smashed I was.

"I'm fineee. Brucey. Don't worry about me," I drawled, slurring every single syllable as Josh stood in front of me with his hands on his hips with a small smile.

"I know you're fine but I just wanted to make sure," Josh replied sweetly before crouching down and peering up into my eyes that I couldn't keep open for longer that a couple of seconds.

 "What's going on?" He asked.

I reached out and placed my hands on his shoulders before lowering my voice, "I wanted to... to say sorry for bein' a shit friend the last few weeks... I just... I... You know, things haven't been very good lately and..." I paused before glancing up at Tom and leaning closer to Josh, our faces merely inches from one another so Tom couldn't hear me. At least that's what I thought in my inebriated state.

"And I didn't wanna tell you this but... I... I had a sexy dream about you and... And I just needed time to process that," I slurred, the words slipping from my mouth without a second thought as I clutched Josh's shoulders and leaned back with a grimace.

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