Swans Don't Quit

Appointment

 Dad left for Seattle yesterday and I have to take Isabella to her doctor's appointment. I wasn't exactly looking forward to it because I was a bit anxious about this appointment. Something felt off and I didn't know what it was. Leah had even tried to calm my nerved to no avail. I had taken off early today to take her to this appoint and would have to work overtime once dad got back to make up for it. Isabella had gotten a little bigger and could no longer fit behind the wheel of her truck. This meant that dad had been driving her back and forth to school or Jake would come up from La Push or they would spend the evening at the house.

Luckily Dan was okay with changing our schedule for the couple days that dad was in Seattle and I had to drive Isabella to school. We came in an hour late and left an hour late. Thankfully Isabella's friend Angela offered to drive Isabella to the station after school to wait for my shift to be over. It was odd having to incorporate another person into my schedule instead of making plans as I go.

The drive to the doctor's had been quiet and the wait to be called in had been long. When they finally called her in Isabella had grabbed my hand hard and tugged my arm to have me come with her. I was hesitant, but when she gave me a pleading look I relented and got up with her. The weighed her and did some measurements to make sure that Alex was growing like he should. They had me step out of the room while the doc did the internal exam. I was outside the room for about three minutes before I was allowed back. A nurse rolled the sonogram machine into the room, setting it up as the doctor had Isabella raise her shirt and squirted the cold blue gel onto her abdomen.

The nurse handed the doctor the little wand and she quickly started moving it around on Isabella's stomach as she looked intently at the screen. She pointed out all the limbs, fingers, toes, the features on his face. Alex was sucking on his thumb which had Isabella almost in tears as I stared mesmerized at the screen. No matter how many times I brought Isabella to these appointments and saw the little guy on the screen it was just amazing, seeing him grow and change over the weeks.

Doc printed out some pictures and handed them to me to hold. Isabella wiped away the tears that fallen down her face as she looked at the screen. The doc was staring intently as she clicked away on the keyboard. She had a finally click and the machine started making a weird thumping noise that I had learned was the sound of Alex's heart beating away. The doc and nurse were listening hard to the machine and I had a feeling this was bad. They hadn't done that at any of the other appointments and it was putting me on edge.

The doc started clicking away at the keyboard and started moving the wand around again. She focused in on a spot and was really studying the image on the screen. I leaned backward away from Isabella to get a glimpse of the screen. I could see the movement of the little organ that was Alex's heart. My stomach started twisting in knots as I realized they most think there's something wrong with his heart. My suspicions seemed confirmed when the doc sent the nurse and asked for several things to be brought into the room in-between a whole bunch of medical terms before turning back to Isabella and I with a serious look.

"On the sonogram I saw what seemed like a malformation of the baby's heart and I'm going to have to do some tests before we get too concerned." She said and we slowly nodded before she left the room. I grabbed Isabella's hand as tears began running down her face and she rubbed a spot on her abdomen. The tears quickly turned into whole hearted sobs and I lifted her up into a hug.

"Shhhh... They're just doing tests and they'll come back in a while and tell us that our concerns were for nothing." I tried soothing as I rubbed her back in a calming matter while I tried to hold back my own tears and worries as well as the worst case scenarios that were running through my head.

"I can't take care of a sick baby, Eli." She sobbed into my neck as I hugged her a little tighter.

"I thought I would be able to...but I can barely take care of myself and now a sick baby?" She cried and I winced at the pain in her words.