Here All Along

chapter - 6

Aunt Irin once told me no matter how hard a person is, there will always be times they'll want to be needy and spoilt. Some people are like that when they get fever. Women are mostly like that when they have cramps. Children are like that when they are hungry. For Win, it was on his birthdays. It was the happiest day of his year (and most tiring for aunt Irin). If he was wayward on regular days, he was a rebel on his birthdays. A Satan's child, as aunt Irin used to remark jokingly.

He had a weird habit of wearing his clothes inside out on his birthdays and the first thing he'd want would be a wish from me, accompanied with a list of five new things I grew to like about him since the previous birthday. I always made sure to be there when he woke up (even in his eleventh birthday when he was upset about failing at a preliminary test and said he didn't want to see nobody). Well, i always kept myself away from the flood of everybody in his life. I fancied the idea that I was an exception to him (which amplified more from the fact that I was indeed the only person he talked to that day).

Anyways, the clock stroke six thirty in the morning when I was at aunt Irin's door.

"You should have slept over here last night" she said, yawning and letting me in. It seemed she had just woken up.

I only responded with an apologetic smile before skittering up the stairs to Win's room.

He was asleep, mouth slightly ajar as he snored. The bed dipped as i sank my knees in it and hovered over Win.

I never knew boys could be pretty until my eyes beheld the soothing sight of Win sleeping that morning. He was always an adorable kid, the kind your hands would itch to hold and squish. Since we were always together, it was possible to not notice the difference but I realised that he was actually getting handsomer with each day. His features had sharpened, saffron hair long and shiny, almost fell down to his nape. His fingers had somewhat streched and (since he was fond of exercise) he had earned a lot of muscles. He did not look awkward at all, like his brother and i did when we were on the brink of adolescence. But then, Win was different to begin with.

When I was gratified with enough speculation of him, i bent down and softly pecked the side of his forehead. His skin was warm and had a lingering smell of cinnamon and grasses that we had in grandma's backyard, like always. The feeling of guardianship overwhelmed me and i kissed his head again, my little baby who was a big boy now.

"Happy birthday" i whispered before blowing in his ear.

He flinched and grunted before shuffling under blanket. I let out a small chuckle and woke him up.

"Whatttt do you want?" He slurred, getting up groggily.

"I want you to be happy and healthy and loved and successful."

I repeated what i said every year and that seemed to light up a bulb in his mind.

"Oh it's my birthday" he said lazily, wiping his face off of drool and sleep.

I ruffled his hair in an attempt to wake him up but he leaned in my touch instead. I laughed, rubbing his cheeks when he flopped back in the bed, tucking one of my hands between his cheek and the pillow before closing his eyes.

"Let me sleep some more" he said sluggishly.

Aunt Irin's voice came from downstairs to call us for breakfast.

"I made you a list. Won't you read it?"

That seemed to chase his drowsiness away. His eyes were still close but he smiled knowingly, his cheeks two seeds of pomegranate.

"Read it to me, please?" He whispered.

...

We arrived at lumba beach around eleven thirty. It was windy and bluish sunny, a perfect weather to go out. By the time we were done cleaning the area and setting up whatever articles we had for the camp, it was already mid afternoon. Win was in a purple Hawaiian shirt (that his parents gifted) and shorts, sun bathing with his friends he had invited and ogling at girls his age (given if there were any, on the beach by that time and they were still sticking to the entire plan). He told me I could hang out with them but I knew better than doing that. He would be embarrassed and his friends did not like me too so there was that. Phi Earth had brought his girlfriend too and deserved more than having a third wheel ruin their vibes. And i was too young to blend in the group of adults so when aunt Irin waved an inviting hand, i ignored it.