Here All Along

chapter -19

There was no way I'd have dropped Win to his dorm that night. He was too drunk and in a kissing mode. May be he would have only kissed me and not a stranger but I knew better than taking a risk so I brought him home. Mom was awake and saw me carrying Win from the car to my room.

"What happened to him now?" She asked from the threshold of my room's door in a tone that implied Win was a regular nuisance who kept causing troubles. I avoided her and tucked Win in my bed and covered him with a blanket.

"Bright..."

"Mom please" said I, walking past her in the corridor.

She followed quickly.

"You cannot shut me up everytime Bright" she hissed lowly.

"So what should I do?" I asked, my tone calm and composed.

She folded her arms against her chest and huffed.

"He's having you wrapped around his fingers. Open your eyes Bright. See how is he using you."

I shook my head in disbelief. At this point, I had no idea what would come out of her mouth about Win. She hated him obviously and yet, her reasons were unpredictable (and unreasonable) to me.

"Its funny" I chuckled dryly, "you always say he is using me but the fact is he gave me something you never could; his time. Win and I grew up with each other's love. I'm sorry mom, if you weren't around to see that."

I knew it was a cruel thing to say but she had not been sensitive to my pains as well so there was an impulsive urge to give her the taste of her own fruit. I did not wait for her to stop gaping and attack me with her words again and simply walked away.

I entered in my room, trying to get used to the mild darkness inside. I sank beside Win who slept peacefully, so conveniently oblivious to the tsunami of emotions he caused inside me with a small act in his drunken stupor. I could still feel the lingering sensation of his lips against mine, warm and so perfect like they were made to fit together. I wanted to kiss his lips again. To taste his sweet mouth and smoky breathe, to rub our noses together, whisper words of my deepest affection. But he was asleep and I was afraid, for I couldn't really trust myself now especially when we had just made out. I blowed deep puffs of air out before carefully leaning in and pecked above one of his eyes and before my lips could make it to the place he wouldn't want me to had he been sober, I climbed out of my bed altogether. I fathomed it would be great to spend the night on my study table. My eyes were vacant of sleep anyway.

There was a sweet pain in my chest from the anticipation of what the next morning beheld. There were only two options really.

Either we'd kiss again or we would never.

.
.
.
.

When morning met my eyes, Win was nowhere in my room. I rubbed my eyes and found a sticky note on my forehead that said, thank you for not selling my kidney last night. I'm sure I gave you enough reasons to (though I can't remember). Had a class, see you later.

I breathed in relief to think there was still some time before the apocalypse. If i knew him well (which i did), he would never be able to act subtle about last night. I was sure he didn't remember yet. Because if he did, he'd have started soundly ignoring me, meaning he would be obvious about it. I had to wait for that obvious sign from him which i got while I was in my office.

Win:
My classes are prolonged. Let's cancel tonight's dinner.

My heart skipped a beat. It was happening. Win was using unconvincing lame excuses to avoid me. I called him immediately. He didn't receive my call. I called again, wiping a bead of sweat from my forehead. It was already past afternoon which meant his classes were over and he did not have his swimming practices today which was why we scheduled our dinner together at first place. I kept calling him at regular intervals and after a while, his phone went off.