Even If It Hurts (Completed)

Chapter 24

They say that breaking someone's heart on or before his or her exams is the worst thing you can do to someone. I proved that right now that I am in that exact moment of my life.

Having a broken heart while taking the Nursing Licensure Examination is the worst thing I have ever experienced so far.

My hand is shaking terribly while I am shading the answer of my choice. Hindi iyon dahil sa kaba pero dahil iyon sa sakit na nagmumula roon sa nasugatang palad ko at sakit ng puso ko sa mga nangyari dalawang gabi na ang nakararaan. Hindi ko pa rin lubos maisip na pinagdaanan ko iyon sa panahon pa na magti-take ako ng board exam.

I heaved a deep breath and exhaled it slowly. I looked at my bandaged hand, silently pleading that it wouldn't feel as terrible as I am feeling right now. Sana naman pakisamahan ako ng kamay ko ngayon.

Despite the physical and emotional pain I am going through right now, I am still adamant on passing the board. Iyon na lang ang pakunswelo ko sa lahat ng mga napagdaanan ko. Ayokong bumagsak. Kailangan kong makapasa. Para sa pamilya at mga kaibigan kong all-out ang suporta at para na rin sa sarili ko.

After a few hours of taking the exam—that felt like forever—I went out of the examination room and settled myself on the kiosk far from the school building where I took the exam.

Yesterday was a mess. I was a mess. Iyak lang ako ng iyak sa transient house na binook ni KC last minute the other day.

Pag-alis na pag-alis namin sa club noong gabing iyon ay sa condo ni KC nila ako dinala. I didn't know how KC contacted Charles to get to his place, but Charles was already there waiting for us. And then they tended my wound, trying to talk to me, but I was just crying the whole time.

Wala na akong naging usisa pa sa ginawa ng mga kaibigan ko para sa akin. Hindi talaga kasi ako maaawat sa pag-iyak no'n. Basta pinasakay nila ako sa sasakyan ni Charles then he drove me to a transient house here in Baguio instead sa hotel na nabook na ni KC last month pa.

Charles was just silent the whole time we travel uplands until we got inside the transient house. He didn't say anything aside from making me feel that I wasn't alone. That he was there, with me.

After an hour, Marg and KC arrived. Umiyak lang ulit ako sa balikat ng mga kaibigan ko. Wala akong maalalang ibang ginawa kung 'di ang umiyak lang doon kasama sila.

"Bakz, kumusta?" It was Marg. I looked at her hand on my shoulder before I looked up at her. She is smiling at me, but it is just a small one.

Kasama ko siya sa examination room kanina dahil sa last names namin—Salazar ako. Salvador naman siya. Sina Charles at KC ang nalayo sa amin. Charles Tiu at Kyzen Cyrus Corpuz.

"Okay lang naman. Mahirap pero nakasagot naman ako. Ikaw?" sagot ko sa kanya. I looked at her as she struggles to sit on the bench beside me. Nakahawak siya sa tiyan niya. Inalalayan ko siya sa pag-upo.

She sighed a deep breath. "Okay din," agap niya pagkatapos ay ngumiwi. Hinilot niya iyong tiyan niya.

"Okay ka lang," tanong ko sa kaibigan ko. I adjusted my body to face her and to check on her. Small beads of sweat are forming on her forehead. And then my eyes have widened a fraction. I guess my friend's water just broke!

"Manganganak na ata ako, bakz," aniya. I got quite nervous, but I didn't panic. This is one of the things I learned from my degree.

"Relax muna, Marg ha. Pumutok na ang panubigan mo so manganganak ka na talaga," kalmado kong sab isa kanya. Nilabas ko muna ang cellphone ko para matext ng mabilis si KC na manganganak na si Margaux para hindi siya maghanap sa amin paglabas niya ng examination room niya. Then I helped my friend to get up.