Entertaining a Small Thought

3rd Arc Part 21: Rantaro Amami

"...I'm leaving. Don't bother me." Those were the words that left Ryoma's mouth before he left Rantaro, Rin, and Kokichi.

"Ryoma, wait!" Rin called out to the ex-tennis player as he got up in an attempt to follow him, but Rantaro stopped him.

"I'll talk to him," Rantaro told him. "You and Kokichi need to head back to Gonta's research lab for that screening party. It's almost nighttime, after all. I'll go talk to Ryoma and make sure he doesn't do anything reckless." Rin gave Rantaro an unsure look before peaking over to where Ryoma was headed. He then sighed before giving the adventurer a slight nod.

"Okay. I trust you. If anyone can do it, it's our reliable mysterious adventurer." He said with a nervous smile.

"Yep, that's me. Just focus on what you need to do. I'll handle this." Rantaro told him as he walked off after Ryoma.

That's right. This was something Rantaro was good at. It's a skill you would have to pick up when you're in charge of 12 little sisters. Of course, Rantaro didn't think too highly of his skill as a big brother. He was hardly qualified to be called by that lofty title after losing all of his sisters to the wilderness. But even if he was the world's worst older brother, that didn't mean that he wasn't going to try to be a reliable role model for his friends. If he could, he wanted to be someone they could come to for help. A trustworthy friend and perhaps someone you could vent to. He was that person for his sisters, and he never really minded it. If he could help, then he was happy.

Rantaro soon caught up with Ryoma, who had walked away from the dorms to near the Shrine of Judgment. Ryoma heard Rantaro approach him and turned around with a dark expression before he sighed. "I thought I told you guys that I didn't want to be bothered."

"I understand that you'd rather be alone right now, but I can't just leave a friend in need by himself, can I?" Rantaro responded with his usual calm smile. Ryoma just huffed as he shook his head.

"Friends, huh? Wouldn't that be nice?" He mumbled as he bit down hard on the candy cigarette in his mouth. "You don't have to pretend to care, you know."

"You think that I'm pretending?"

"Aren't you? You're always wearing that calm, reassuring look, but there's no way that's real after what you just saw. I saw your fists shaking after your video ended." Ryoma noted. "But...that's not a bad thing. You got a reason to survive... That's the complete opposite of me." Ryoma's voice began darker and darker as his expression twisted into one of defeat. "Heh... That's good. If you've got something to live for, it means your life has value."

"That doesn't mean that your life is any less valuable than mine or anyone else's. Don't be stubborn." Rantaro softly chided.

"Hmph..." Ryoma shrugged as he looked around. "...You know, we're all alone right now."

"Huh?" Rantaro felt a chill as he thought about what Ryoma was trying to apply with that statement. Ryoma then turned his back to Rantaro and gave a broken chuckle.

"If anything were to happen right now, no one would be any wiser." He continued as he looked at the starry sky. "If I were to die like this, that wouldn't be so bad. You'll be able to go and save your sisters too, so go on and do it already."

Rantaro was completely shocked by what Ryoma said, feeling his stomach tighten in response.

"Wh...What are you doing?" Rantaro asked. "Why would you tell me that? Why would you want me to do that to you?"

"Why not? It'd be a better use of my life than living for no reason." Ryoma responded. "In truth, I should have died a while ago. No...I've been dead since the moment I killed those mafia goons. This will be better for everyone."