Dear Diary,
Hello again. G only wants me to do a cut a day, I did four yesterday and so far I've only done three today. That's some what of an improvement right? I just don't know what to do. I want to get better for G, but at the same time I want to be alone so I can do as I please and not worry about hurting anyone. It fucking sucks having all these different thoughts whirling around in my head, saying that I'm nothing, worthless, unwanted, unloved. Then there's the small voice saying that maybe someone likes me. It's like almost my whole being is screaming at me to go die and rot, while one tiny voice tells me to stay. I wish it would all end, I wish I would die already. I tired of lying. I done with crying. Yet inside, I'm still dying. Why? Why can't I be happy without wanting to slit my wrist or some other part of my body open. Every time I do it, I feel so ashamed and hate myself, but at the same time I feel satisfied. I hate it, I hate it so much, but not as much as I hate myself. It's a loose loose situation.
Artistically yours,
H
YOU ARE READING
Dear Diary
Non-FictionFirst you should know that the original details were a lie. I did that because I kinda didn't want to risk my mother finding this book. Now that I have precautions I can say that this is my diary. Yeah, sorry for all the grammar mistakes and languag...
