One, two butterflies

Chapter 21

Waking up in Mina's arms was something Chaeyoung hated getting attached to. It's not something they could do every day or often. Even if they wanted to, it would be too much far too soon and they both knew distance was necessary to make it work. And so, she laid awake watching Mina's heart beat against her collarbones. She listened to and felt her soft breathing trying to enjoy the moment as much as she possibly could. 

Chaeyoung didn't care to look at the light peering in, she didn't mind that her arm was asleep. All she wanted was to stay in that moment forever. She also didn't pay attention to the fact that Mina was also wide awake. How could she? She was too focused on her scent and feeling to even think about her awaken state.

"What are you thinking about?" Mina's morning voice woke her up.

Chaeyoung was startled before rolling off and laying beside her lover in embarrassment. "Nothing. What are you thinking about"

It was a lie. Chaeyoung was thinking about how much she loved having her so close. She thought about how if she could, she would do it all to maintain Mina happily by her side. More thoughts she was too much of a coward to admit.

"Nothing" Another lie. They both shared similar thoughts. "Whyd you go away?"

"Hmm?" The girl hummed still feeling tired.

Mina swallowed her pride. "You were laying on me a second ago and then you went away"

It made Chaeyoung's heart flutter. "My arm is asleep. I'm sorry"

"It's okay" Mina groaned laying onto the girl's warm body. "My turn"

The girl was immediately welcomed by the weight of Mina's body on her. She loved it and held her torso wanting to keep her close. They were both incredibly comfortable and would do anything to stay this way.

"What are you thinking about?" Asked Mina.

"I'm falling asleep" Chaeyoung yawned. "What are you thinking about?"

"I've never been more comfortable"

"Me neither"

They were each other's greatest comfort.

Mina had to leave and take care of things at home way before Chaeyoung wanted her to. She was left with a pillow with the scent of Mina and hated how it was impossible to have her close again for the day.

The girl sat by her living room window looking out at the snow falling holding herself together resting her chin onto her knees. She felt lonely, incredibly lonely. But why? She felt fulfilled just an hour ago with Mina in her arms but now that she's gone, it feels like she has nothing at all.

She spent the beginning of the day in bed scrolling through her phone. Chaeyoung was surprisingly hungry after a while she served her self cereal two times in a row. Her stomach felt fulfilled and she enjoyed that feeling. After that, she tidied up her room and did some laundry. Today, she didn't feel as exhausted. Maybe it was gone, she thought.

It never was but she liked to believe that.

It was a little after six that she received a call from Yoongi. And it was at seven that she arrived at his house after biking in the cold December air. The pale boy could walk again and insisted that Chaeyoung would come over to celebrate with him and the three other boys. She was more to than happy to hear the news and obliged. Unfortunately for the girl's well being, there was beer and bottles of all types of alcohol included along with a bunch of substances that she found herself easily drawn to.

It's a trap she told herself, you thought it'd be a good day, you thought you'd stay clean but of course, at the end of the day I'm still fucked.