happiness is a butterfly

runaway

Beverley is happy to finally meet her.

She is tall and slim and blonde and blue eyed. Her skin is golden and freckled and she smells of patchouli and chai tea.

The two Mrs Jacobs greet each other with fake affection and a couple of backhanded compliments. There's a slight disagreement over who bought potatoes or sweet potatoes laced with forced smiles.

Cassie is pretty sure Marsha's coffee is laced with alcohol.

As the boys had predicted, she feels Bud's eyes rake over her a few times. He's not super chatty and she can feel the tension between the Jacobs' men as they trail out of the house to visit the shooting range for a couple of hours.

Beverley, or Bev as she likes to be called, insists Cassie help her prepare Easter lunch and puts her to work chopping carrots. She wants to know all about the young girl who stole her grandson's heart, although proceeds to dominate most of the conversation. She's a little bossy, but Cassie appreciates her warm nature and happy voice as they move around the kitchen. She tells her some funny stories about Nate growing up and shows genuine interest in her pregnancy.

"Do you know what you're having?" She asks excitedly, hands covered in flour.

"Not yet, we got to hear the heartbeat during our last scan." Cassie responds with a smile, thinking back to the touching moment shared with Nate in the doctor's office.

His hand holding hers. Their faces mesmerised as the room was engulfed by the sound of their baby's beating heart. It really was special.

"Well, I can tell you now it's a boy." Bev tells her matter of factly. "All Jacobs babies are always boys."

It was true. Bud was one of five brothers, all of which went on to have more boys. Cal's sister Jeanie had been an exception to the rule but she had gone on to have two boys herself, and Marsha had three.

Cassie pictures herself holding a baby boy and she can feel her heart swell. A son. A boy to love her forever. Boys always love their Mamas.

"And they're always big babies, I remember Cal had such a big head." She adds with a laugh. "Nathaniel weighed a lot, like 10 or 11 pounds! He was such a chubby baby."

And as Beverley whispers a poor Marsha, Cassie's vagina hurts a little at the thought of pushing out an 11 pound baby. Noticing the young girl's terrified look, she reassures her she will recover fine. A pretty little thing like you.

She lets the elderly woman continue her enthusiastic narration of family stories and traditions. Cassie welcomes her acceptance of their relationship, freed of any judgement or drama. It feels like the first adult interaction she's had where her relationship has been celebrated rather than crucified.

She can already tell in his Grandmother's eyes, Nate can do no wrong. She highlights his good looks and athletic successes, his good grades and manners. She puts him on a pedestal.

"And that girl he was seeing? She wasn't good for him, all that fighting and she was so demanding. I'm glad he has found you- although I wish you two had waited a little longer for a baby." Bev rambles moving around the space. "It's good to find love and marry young, you can grow your lives together rather than adapt to one another."

"Oh, we haven't really spoken about marriage..." Cassie interrupts briefly before Bev resumes her monologue.

"My Jeanie, she married much later and she is so strong and independent and her husband, he never liked that. They're divorced now, which is a shame. But look at Marsha and Cal...they were young like you and they're still happy together."

And Cassie is glad to have her back to the woman, so she can't see how wide her eyes went at that last part.

"Speaking of- where is Marsha? She needs to switch this oven on for me, can you go get her for me?"

Marsha had excused herself to go to the bathroom not long after the guys had left and she had never come back. She had hoped one of the perks of separating from your husband of 25 years was never entertaining your in-laws again, but she was wrong.

Cassie would find her hiding in their home gym, drinking wine straight from the bottle with Pumpkin sleeping at her feet. Little traitor, she thought.

"Is she gone?" She asks the young blonde. "My mother in law- please tell me that demon is gone."

"She seems...sweet." Cassie responds honestly. She did seem sweet, a little annoying but sweet.

"She's not, it's all fake. This house, this family...it's all show." She invites Cassie to take a seat next to her on the floor.

"I think we should keep some of the wine for lunch?" She offers, hesitantly trying to pry the bottle out of her hands.

"Don't be like me." Marsha tells Cassie holding on to her arm. "If something doesn't feel right, take the baby and go. I stayed for my family and look at what it's done to them, to Nate."

Later, as they walk down the stairs together, she can't help but reflect on the two different Mrs Jacobs and their different perceptions of family. One telling her to dive in and the other telling her to run off.

Run or dive. Live or die.

She texts Nate that she misses him while the two women argue over the oven heat.

She did always turn a blind eye to red flags.

When it starts to get crazy, why can't she just run away?

Baby I got a plan, run away fast as you can