happiness is a butterfly

flowers

He doesn't expect it.

Nate's usually tidy bedroom looks like a bomb has exploded as Cassie gets ready for their Senior Prom. A girl named Tamara is upstairs helping her with hair and make up, a surprise Nate organised for her so that she could feel special tonight.

So while she is upstairs getting ready, he sits in the kitchen sipping on whiskey- courtesy of Cal's collection he left behind.

"Hey honey." Marsha greets him as she walks in from the garden. His mother had made a significant improvement since life as she knew it had come to a crashing halt. "Don't you look handsome in your suit...here let me take a photo for Nana, hide the whiskey!"

Despite the eye roll, Nate pushed aside the crystal cut glass and slapped a half smile on his face. He could hear Marsha rambling about whether or not Cassie would be ready in time for them to take some pictures outside before they left.

She pours herself a wine and joins him, sitting across from him at the kitchen bench.

"Your last high school prom..." She says in a giddy voice. "My baby is all grown up!" He wonders if this is her first glass of wine. "Lucky for me there will soon be another little man running around."

"Are you drunk?" He asks point blank.

"No, I'm just excited to be a glamma.' She rolls her eyes before eyeing off this whiskey in front of her son. "You should probably cool down with the drinks though, before you know it this baby will be here so-"

"Can you like not lecture me?" She can hear the annoyance in his voice and decides to drop the argument, for no reason other than wanting Cassie to be able to enjoy her night without Nate being a grouch.

The morning after her conversation with Nate, Cassie had gone up to Marsha and hugged her out of nowhere before starting to cry. Marsha was confused to say the least, until the blonde started blubbering about accidents and baby names and Bennett.

So they had a moment, woman to woman, mom to mom.

As much as she had been guilty of making the occasional snide aside about her son moving his girlfriend in, Marsha had come to enjoy the blonde's company. They had gone shopping for new outfits for Marsha, now single, and Cassie, now pregnant. They had eaten ice cream while watching the Bachelor and cried when Teresa Giudice went to jail. They had cooked meals together and binged on take out. They had judged and flirted with 40+ year old men on Marsha's new Tinder account.

She cared for the girl.

She also felt a little sorry for Cassie. It was sad that a young girl had so much time to spend with her boyfriend's mom, rather than be out with her friends. Nate also wasn't the best boyfriend, if she had to be completely honest. She watched her son go out every weekend while Cassie waited for him at home. She too had been a teenage mom once, but she remembers all the fun parties her and Cal would go to together.

Cassie, on the other hand, was Nate's little prisoner.

Sometimes she wondered if the girl even asked him for permission to pee.

She would also hear the myriad of arguments they had, Nate's numerous meltdowns. How he would punch walls and break vases and shout endlessly. She would wait and listen and ponder when to intervene. And though he hadn't, and though she would never admit it, she waited in fear for his handprints on Cassie's neck.

"I heard you told Cassie about your brother..." Nate gives her a brief look before going back to his drink. "I'm glad you're opening up-"

"Yeah, this is exactly what I want to talk about before prom. Thanks Mom." Nate's sarcastic tone isn't lost on Marsha's ears.

Then again, her son had always been like this. He covered himself in an armature of sarcasm and overall jackassery to protect himself from vulnerability.

"I'm trying to have a moment with you."

"Well, don't."

Marsha let out an exasperated sigh before reaching in her pocket and sliding a jewellery box across the kitchen bench.

"What's this?" Nate asks with a chin nudge, his hand slowly going to open the box. "If this is your engagement ring from Cal, you can keep it. That's bound to be cursed."

Her eyes roll at her son's predictable comment

"I bought this ring when we went to Mexico, it was a birthday present to myself. Your father had pissed me off so I took the afternoon to myself and bought a way too expensive ring."

She remembers being so giddy at finally having the chance to take the afternoon away from her kids and to have a couple of cocktails and do a whole lot of shopping on Cal's Amex.

She had fallen in love at first sight with the large diamond ring. Having married so young, her ring had always been modest, but their financial situation had changed over the years. Still, the ring was much more expensive than what she could spend comfortably. An inkling of her husband's wandering eye and too long conversation with the bellboy had made her swipe his card without a second thought.

Her eyes shone bright from the excitement of her new ring which she couldn't wait to show off to her judgy friends.

But then she had gotten a call to rush back to the resort.

And her life crumbled before her.

How could she have been so selfish? All she had wanted was an afternoon away from her children, and now she would never get to hug her son again.

"After what happened, I couldn't stand to look at it." She tells him, her eyes gazing over the bright stone. "It's been sitting in the safe for years." Her eyes move over to look at Nate's perplexed face. "So, here, you can have it."

Nate remains silent for a few seconds as his mom hands the ring box to him. He looks at the large stone in front of him, at the way the cuts catch the afternoon sun. Glistening.

The ring was immaculate, a clear sign of it being kept hidden away for years. Marsha had never found the will to wear it, its opulent design a constant reminder of her shame as a mother. She also couldn't bring herself to sell it and let go of it completely. She would sometimes put it on when sitting alone in her bedroom, and then she would cry and cry and cry.

"I thought you said not to marry anyone I met in high school." He finally breaks their silence, looking at her across the bench.

"Since when do you do as I say?" She quips back with a teasing glance.

"Touche." He concedes with laughter.

"I'm not saying tonight, and I'm not saying you have to marry her. But if the time ever feels right, you have my blessing."

He gives the ring a final glance, before closing the box and placing it safely in the pocket of his jacket.

And secretly Marsha wonders whether by giving Nate her blessing, she had just signed Cassie's execution.

My heart aches when I see your face, that's the story of this life but my soul saw it twice.