He's been gone...
She has been doing every all by herself.
But now he is back.
~*~
Logan Synnott has been away at sea for months. His wife Ariana has been home with their twins running the whole household herself. When Logan gets home, Ari will hav...
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The rest of the day didn't go any better either.
Here I was sitting alone watching the sharks swim around all by myself.
No one could bother to come and find me.
After some of the comments Logan's parents had made today, I just couldn't take it anymore. I needed to get away from them and this seemed like the only way to do it. The sharks continued to swim in the large tank in front of me not knowing that people were crowding the glass to watch them in their beauty. Mazie was excited about the giraffes but this was what really got me excited. Sharks were always my favorite animal. I had plenty of stuffed sharks growing up.
They just kept moving, no matter what they couldn't stop. If a shark stopped they would sink to the bottom of the tank and die. That was kind of like how it was in a military relationship. If you don't keep moving, keep pushing forward through another day you will die. This life will kill you. That doesn't even include the danger that Logan is in every single time he leaves our house. This life isn't for the weak, but as I sit here looking at these sharks that's all I feel.
Weak.
What a silly four letter word. Alone it's an insult, one that young kids would spew at a playground and continue on about their day. As you get older though that word gets more harsh. It's one of the only ones that does that. Words like bitch lose all meaning the more you hear them, but weak, that word never goes away. When someone calls you weak that's exactly how you feel.
So when Logan's mother had the audacity to call me weak for standing up for my children I just couldn't take it anymore. I can only imagine what they are saying about me now.
I bet they couldn't be happier that I was gone, sitting here, in this building filled with blue lights, alone. Feeling like the weakest person on the planet. Especially since I just ran away. I couldn't make any comments back. Logan would have been so upset with me if I had opened my mouth and tried to defend myself. But the more I let her walk all over me like that, the more I am just the true definition of weak.
I wondered what animals they were looking at now. Were my kids having fun? Was my husband having fun? I was sitting here alone, missing out on all this time I could be having with them.
Maybe Logan started yelling at them as soon as I left. Did I really stay long enough to give him a chance to handle the situation? Why wouldn't he ever handle it for me? Why was I always the one that had to just deal with it and he acted like it wasn't ever happening? Did he know it was happening?
I could feel the hot tears forming in the corners of my eyes. They threatened to fall with every question.
Even so, the shark just continued swimming.
My eyes latched onto one of the larger ones, watching as she twirled her way through the water so smoothly, so gracefully, and everything just seemed to get out of her way. Nothing was going to stop her. Nothing was going to hold her back.
