The Hermitcraft Plays

The play begins

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This book now contains 3 books

This first is 'The Hermit Play'

The second is 'The Hermit Christmas Play'

And the third (that's currently being written) is 'The Third Hermit Play' 

The second and third are marked by all-caps chapter names.

They're all individual stories that work on their own, but will contain references to previous plays in them

Joehillssays: can everyone meet at spawn?

Joehillssays: I... have a surprise. 

Zombiecleo: oh notch save us all

GoodTimeWithScar: I like surprises!

Zombiecleo: what did you break?

Joehillssays: I didn't break anything! Just... I have a surprise. I made something

Grian: what? 

Joehillssays: you'll see! 

Not that long later, everyone was gathered in the spawn of Season 9. Joe stood on top of the 'communal crafting area', holding something. 

'What do you think it is?' Grian muttered to Scar. His friend shrugged back.

'Something fun, I think.' 

'Bet you half my diamonds pillar that he broke something.' Cub muttered.

'Bet you all of mine that he didn't.' Scar challenged back. The two shook on it, ignoring Grian laughing in the background. 

'So... I made a thing?' Joe began uncertainly. 'I... wrote a play. For us to perform. In 8 weeks. To our friends outside the server. I might've told a couple of people and... news spread.'

'Joe, I'm going to break your legs.' Cleo decided. 'We are not doing a play.'

'Oh, don't worry. Your part is really small. You're...' he checked a list. 'A bartender. Yeah, I've already cast everyone... scripts are over here.' Joe held up a wad of papers. 'Yes, you're all in it. We'll rehearse the first scene later once everyone's has a good look through.' He jumped off the crafting table house, beginning to past out scripts to all the hermits. Grian immediately snatched his up, scanning the first page. 

'Wait, I'm the main character?! Oh no... this is going to go badly.'

'I'm... wait, Grian, where does it say who I am?' 

'At the top, I think. Well, mine certainly does... wait, I need to see who Mumbo's playing.' Scar watched him jog off, before turning to Cub.

'You've got a couple of diamonds to give me.'

'After the play.' 

'No, Cub. Now. I'm not falling for your tricks.'

'Scar, do you really think we're going to get through 8 weeks of learning a play without Joe breaking something?' 

'Well that wasn't the deal, was it?!' 

'Tell you what, I'll give you a quarter of it. And then the rest if this show goes perfectly. As in, the rest of the pillar.' 

'Fine. Also, who are you playing?' 

''Friend who appears halfway through and helps them on their quest' apparently.' 

'Ohhh, so that's what I am... I thought that was just the description...'

'Nah, man. I guess that's your name...' Cub laughed. 'See you around, uhh 'friend who comes along partway through the quest and argues a bit with another person before they actually become friends.''

'Bye Cub...' 

'Uhhh... you can come up with names yourself.' Joe remembered. 'Those are just the descriptions I came up with. So, read the scripts and then... Grian, Pearl, Beef, Mumbo, Gem and Wels, you're in the first scene!' 

'Aannnd, first rehearsal, scene one, going from the start, Grian, let's go!'

Grian looked around the makeshift stage they'd made, looked at his script and with a cough, began.

'Welcome! Friends, pets, and whoever else is here, to the village of- uhh 'insert town name once I've thought of it' where I, your humble main character, lives. Be prepared, be astounded, by the show we have for you today, and the quests that I must go on to acquire the - is this still going?! - magical artefact that will save us all from certain doom!' 

'What's this about certain doom?' Pearl walked onstage to say. 

'Oh, nothing. How are you doing, name of Pearl's character?'

'CUT! Grian, do you have to be so literal reading the script?' Joe sighed 

'I'm just reading what it says. Isn't that- what I'm supposed to do.'

'Yes, but... not everything. Continue.'

'I'm doing great!  Hey, have you heard about the great evil coming to find us?'

'Yes.'

Silence.

'GRIAN!'

'What?! You said not to literally read the script, so I'm paraphrasing.' 

'Don't. Read. Any. Names.' Joe replied, as though he was 3. 'But. Read. The. Rest. Of. The. Script.'

'Ok...'

'You know what... skip to Wels entering. Pearl, you're offstage by this point.' 

The Aussie shrugged, jumping off the stage into where the audience would be before Joe could yell at her. Wels appeared from stage left.

'Hello! I am Sells-knight! I hear you are in need of some equipment for your quest?'

'I am. Can you offer some for my journey?'

'I sure can! In fact, the townspeople packed in advance. Here you go.' Ignoring all confusion from the seemingly mistaken casting of the main character, Wels mimed handing Grian a bag. 'Have fun on your travels! And watch out for weirdos on the road. You don't know who you can trust out there...' He walked off, leaving Grian still confused.

'Aaandd... cut! Well done, Wels and Pearl. Grian... uhh... you did well too?'

'Did... Wels... give me anything? The script says...?'

'Well we don't have a bag of equipment yet, do we? So he pretended to give it to you.'

'Ohhh... another question, why am I the main character?'

'Uhh... It's a long story? Basically, I told Scott about the play, so he could find some people who wanted to watch it and... Techno told me he'd only watch if you were the main character so...'

'Technoblade's going to be watching?!' 

'Yeah... he threatened a PvP fight between us and... I lost, so you're now the main character I guess. Right, we'll meet here tomorrow for the second scene. It'll be just Grian and Pearl, but the rest of you start learning your lines in the mean time.'