The Hermitcraft Plays

10: The final battle

'Right! If we work hard, we can finish running through the play today... Same positions as last time. Wels, you're still dead. Scar, you've just appeared, Grian, Etho, you get backstage and wait there. Stress, you've just killed Wels... The rest of the protagonists get to where you were before. Cub, you're also about to enter the stage and... Begin!

'I will MURDER YOU!' Vowed Rendolf. 'Bells was innocent!'

'Wels is just as bad as the rest of you. You cannot defeat us, we're stronger than you! If we can defeat the Christmas God, we can defeat you!'

'Fight me here and now and we'll see.'

'Alright then. You with all your powers and me with mine.'

'Rendolf, stop this! You can't fight him and win!' Pleaded Pearlie.

'What is winning but a false sense of gratification in a world where nothing goes your way? Maybe it is not winning that matters, but the journey it takes to get there.'

'Kill him! By the powers of Skidoodle!'

'What is fighting?'

'If you win, you get to free the Christmas God and the Christmas Tree-tho. If not, we get to kill every single one of you.'

'Rendolf please. It's not worth it. We can defeat them another way.'

A pause. Ren dropped his sword.

'Pearlie's right. We don't need to fight if you do the right thing.'

'Fine then. We will just kill all of you. Oh Cuuub!'

'That's the other one! Rendolf, get back! He's evil!'

Cub strode onto the stage, joining Scar.

'So the brave resistance has arrived... A group of idiots, the poor friend dragged along and the brave dog boy who's still too scared to fight.'

'Free the Christmas God or we will fight you.'

To which Cub let out his villain laugh.

'YOU'RE STILL TOO GOOD AT BEING EVIL, CUB!' Came Grian's yell from backstage

'The prisoners won't be freed any time soon. But I guess we've got some new supernatural powers to join them...'

'Why trap us with physical chains when we are already bound by the power of reality and science?'

'What is prison?'

'We will fight back! Come, my dumb brothers! Let's use our powers and destroy these Christmas Vexes!' Tango declared, then started a low hum, waving his arms around. Zedaph and Impulse joined in, stepping threateningly towards the convex.

'We're immortal! We're all powerful! We're immortal, we're all powerful! We will kill you! We're all powerful!' They started chanting. Grian's laughter could be heard backstage. Scar hid behind Cub. Rendolf and Pearlie made way for them. 'We're the Three Dumb Men!

'Casper the MURDEROUS GHOST!'

'BAZZA THE ALMIGHTY!'

'And General Melchett, God of the dark arts and master of the powers of Skidoodle!'

'Release the vexes!' Was Scar's reply, and Cub pressed a button that definitely wasn't there yesterday, revealing an Evoker.

'Release the vexes!' He replied, as the small blue creatures covered the stage.

'Flee with extra flee!' yelped Tango, running, followed closely by Zedaph. Impulse, Ren, Wels and Pearl tried to fight them, Stress fled. Grian's scream of fear and frustration cut through the convex's laughter and Joe bellowing at them.