The Hermitcraft Plays

the greatest betrayal in history

'Welcome to week 1 of The Tree Play! Act one, scene one, go!'

Etho walked onto the half-reconstructed stage, very early on the first day of 6th week of rehearsals, dressed resplendently in his tree costume. 

'Hello! I am Treetho! And something terrible is happening!' 

Keralis the boosh ran onstage, looking horrified. 

'The anti-tree people are coming! They're going to destroy all the trees!'

'Oh no! What are we going to do?' They both looked to the audience consisting of Jevin and Jevin only, mock-horror on their faces.

'Wait! We can ask the king of the trees for help! Oh Joe Trees! Can you help us?' 

'I am the mighty Joe Trees! I offer assistance to all who requires it!' Came a voice from backstage, before Hypno entered, dressed as Joe, but holding some sticks to make it obvious that it was actually the king of trees. 

'The anti tree people want to kill us! What should we do?' Treetho asked. 

'Find them and tell them to stop!' Ordered Hypno. 'And then they will!' 

'Alright! Let's go find the anti-tree people! Let's go!' Keralis and Etho said in sync, before running offstage. 

This was the moment that Joehills decided to arrive. 

'What- what's going on here?' He asked, though he knew the answer. 

'We're putting on our own play. Because your one sucks.' Jevin replied.

'I- at least go somewhere else to do that! Don't go on my stage!' 

'This is now our stage. Find another one.' 

'And- wait, Hypno, why are you dressed like me?'

'I am the almighty Joe Trees, King of the Trees.' Replied Hypno, somehow keeping a straight face. 

'Just- go and find another stage! This is where our play is!' 

'We are trees. This is our stage.' Jevin stood up, beginning to repeat. The rest of the Treesistance slowly got involved, appearing from around corners, dressed in what apparently was their costumes. 

'I think we should find a different stage.' Grian decided weakly, having just arrived with the rest of the cast for the next scene. 

'You think? Let's... we're going to find a new stage, ok?' Joe walked away, followed by Cub, Grian, Pearl, Ren and Scar, away from the old stage, taking to the air. 

'Right. Let's... continue here.' Joe stopped in the new shopping district, finding a nice area to carry on with the hermit play. 'No one starts onstage... we've skipped the scene with the Swamp Prince... so start at scene 8. 

'Where's the area we're pretending the stage is?'

'Somewhere over there. You all enter the same way, so don't worry about the size of it.'

With a shared glance and shrug from the group, the scene began.

'Captain Jack, are you sure this is the right way?' Renvolio asked, entering behind Cub and Scar. Grian and Pearl were just behind him.

'Oh yeah, I'm sure. Now we've got through the forest, the mountains are just ahead.' 

'I'm glad we're out the forest. It was very colostrophic.' Agreed Scar. 

'Yeah, it was quite claustrophobic.' Grian replied. 'We would've been walking around there for ages if he hadn't arrived. 

'We had a map that would've told us the way. Someone just decided to use a different one instead.'