My Soldier - Missing Home

Calmer Waters

A/N ~~ Hey! How is everyone?? Getting close to the Holidays.. What could happen?


19th December, 2018

~~Day 74, Nepal~~

Normal POV

It's been a few days since the transport arrived down at the Medical Centre and we were able to come back to Base for a shower and a good nights sleep. Not that I managed to get a good nights sleep after what happened with Natalia the night we got back. I hated seeing her in her head the way she was, but then that moment when she leant in, made everything worse. I don't hold anything against her, I know things happen when emotions are running high, but the last few days have been weird because of it. Natalia has been keeping her distance since we have been able to help with the rest of 7 Section with some re-builds after Dr Karr informed us that there was nothing new happening down at the Centre and he could manage everything on his own for now. As much as I didn't feel amazing about leaving him on his own, I trust his word and being able to do something more physical is just what I needed after everything that has been going on to keep me busy. It's been a relief being back with the guys, Miles and Kai acting like they haven't seen me for years but it means a lot having them there to talk too about everything as we get stuck into work. They quickly agreed with how I thought about everything, knowing themselves how hard it can get out here and how emotions can get the best of anyone. We talked about everything and I even asked them if they think I should tell Lizzie, Miles was quick to shut me down, telling me nothing happened and it would only cause tension between us. As much as I agree with him, I want to be completely open and honest with Lizzie about anything so I know I will have to try and tell her somehow..

It felt good being out in the Village helping to build some temporary housing for the locals who lost pretty much everything after the two Earthquakes. Everyone is overly thankful of our work and whoever can help, has been doing what they can with our help. It's always amazing meeting people and being able to interact with the locals, especially the kids. They are always amazed to see us in Uniform and are not shy to ask questions and even get us playing games with them when we have some free time. It helps build relations so Charlie is always encouraging us to be more involved, especially when it comes to the kids. He also likes us to document as much as we can, taking pictures and videos once he makes sure we are okay to do so. It's never easy to keep up with the kids in the heat, but somehow we always manage to do it with a smile on our faces. Some of the pictures we have managed to get are great and I can't wait to be able to send them home to everyone. I know for a fact Lizzie will be gushing over them as soon as she sees the kids, she is a complete softie but it's one of the many things I love about her. I've also managed to get a few pictures that I know Dad will be quick to get printed with some of the landscapes from higher up in the Village. We even got a huge game of football going which everyone got involved with, Charlie and Natalia stood and cheered us on, as well as taking videos of us all getting our asses kicked. The guys were showing off which meant the kids managed to get the better of us and completely destroy our team. It's become a ritual for us that we end up getting beat in a game of football where ever we end up on Tour now but I can tell the guys love it every time.

We are currently working on the re-build of one of the school buildings so the kids can get back to some sort of normality. Hopefully it won't be a temporary building since we managed to get some better building materials so it will last at least a couple of years for the Village. We have a smooth system running between us all as Charlie leads us from the front. The heat is killing us slowly but we are all determined to get as much done as we can. We've been here a couple of days now so we are making some huge process and hopefully we can get it done by tomorrow with it being a smaller building. I'm on carrying duty with Miles as everyone else is doing various other jobs. It's been good being back with one of my best friends but carrying all these materials and tools back and fourth between the School and Truck is getting us working twice as hard as everyone else. But it's helping keep my mind off everything that is still spiralling through my head. "You okay there Lane?" Miles snaps me from my daze as we are walking back to the truck. "Yeah sorry. Just, overthinking as usual." I reply and he quickly chuckles at my blunt answer. "Anything you want to talk about?" He offers and I sigh as we start gathering some more supplies to take back to the guys. "I feel bad with this whole Natalia situation. We finally built a bond and now she is keeping her distance.. I keep trying to catch her to tell her everything is okay but she manages to slip away before I can." I explain as we begin our way back with our hands now full. "Yeah I've noticed.. All you can do is try I suppose Harley. She'll come round eventually, I mean, look what has happened with all of us in the past. She'll come around."

I take a minute to think over what Miles has said, remembering the outbursts and break downs we have all been through at some point and I hum to myself as I think of a way to help Natalia. Charlie offered to chat with her but I know this is on me. "Are you going to tell Lizzie?" Miles asks suddenly and I instantly cringe a little. I know how Lizzie can get with her insecurities and it worries me to think how that conversation could end. "I uh, I don't know to be honest mate. I know I need too but if she doesn't hear me out, things could go south real quick." I say what has been on my mind and he hums in reply. "I agree with the being honest thing but will she understand if you do tell her? I know nothing happened but she might feel differently." Miles tries to help me go through my overactive thoughts like he always does and I smile as we drop off our next load then begin the walk back again. "I mean, no one can understand what we go through out here but hopefully me being open and honest will show her nothing happened that she needs to worry about." I try and convince myself and he nods his head. "That's true. You know her best, I just, I don't want you messing this up. I see how happy she makes you Harley. One silly little thing shouldn't come between you." I smile but my chest also tightens at the thought of Lizzie not trusting me if I tell her, or worse, not believing me. But I need to trust my gut and do what I promised her and be completely honest with her, no matter what happens. "I am happy.. But I can't keep this from her. I just need to make sure to choose the right time and explain what happened to her." I say confidently and he pats my shoulder. "I'm sure you will and it will be fine." He assures me before we fall into conversation about our plans for when we get home.

We all come together to take a break so we can eat and rest. Sparky hands out our food and we all get comfortable together and conversations start easily. We all begin to talk about our plans for getting home and some of the guys all start to plan out their next holiday together. I listen to them trying to decide where they want to go, places like Ibiza and Bali are mentioned before Bones looks over and catches my gaze as I am drinking some of my water. "Come on Lane, what plans do you have to sweep your girl off her feet?" He jokes and everyone quickly turns to give me all their attention. Instantly I start to laugh as I shake my head at their overly excited expressions ready for what I am going to say. "I'll probably end up flying to L.A. Since she is filming at the minute." I say not giving anything away and instantly they all wave me off with the lack of details. "Is that it? Come on Cap we need details here!" Tyler quickly calls me out and everyone laughs with him. I catch Charlie shaking his head at his team's antics before I move to face everyone better, pretty much done with my food now anyways. "I know she wants me to meet her family since we are missing the Holidays together so no doubt that will happen." I start to say and quickly everyone "oohs" teasingly. "Meeting the parents.. Got to impress Cap!" Kai teases and instantly everyone joins in with him, and I quickly flip him off. "You nervous?" Charlie asks over the laughter and I clear my throat, knowing I am beyond nervous but I'm not letting them know that. "Nah, parents love me, come on what's not to love!" I joke and they all quickly join in laughing and teasing. I love these guys and I would be lost without them. I can't wait for them all too meet Lizzie one day, and I know Lizzie can't wait to finally meet them.

"I hope you remember all of us when your living the dream with Lizzie Cap!" Bones jokes and instantly I shake my head. "How could I forget about you lot! I'm not leaving anytime soon, trust me." I quickly reply and everyone is quick to shrug me off. "Oh come on! You'll be living the high life, you'll not want to leave L.A. For a dessert Lane." Tyler adds on and instantly I scoff at him. "I love my job, I'm not giving that up for anything. And let's face it, you'd all be lost without me out here keeping you all alive." I joke and instantly everyone joins in my laughter again. I look around and think to myself there is no way I would leave this team. They mean too much to me and I've worked so hard to get here. As hard as it is to leave everyone behind, I wouldn't change my career for the World. "Plus let's face it, it was obviously the Uniform that helped you pull Lizzie in the first place right?" Miles teases and instantly I throw my nearly empty water bottle at him, making everyone's laughter grow even louder. "I'll have you know, I am very charming when I want to be." I joke back and everyone is quick to try and tease me as I get some M&Ms and pretzels thrown in my direction. We all fall into random conversations before Charlie pulls me to one side. He asks about Natalia and I tell him that I am going to try and sort this out later after we are done for the day. He offers again to step in but I assure him I can sort it. "These things happen Lane. Just make sure you talk with her yeah?" I nod my head in agreement. "Of course Charlie. I'll sort it out." He nods and pats my shoulder. "Good to hear, now, let's get this rabble back to work." I laugh as I nod my head before we turn to get everyone up and back to work, the jokes and teasing not stopping anytime soon. But being here with my team is something I could never get bored of. My little second family..


~~Wednesday Morning, L.A.~~

Lizzie POV

I am so thankful for being able to stay in bed all morning today. After the last few weeks of filming 6 days a week my body is so tired. We wrapped up for the Holidays yesterday so I have 2 and a half weeks break so I can catch up on my sleep up until I go to my Mom's for Christmas. I can't wait to see my family, I love Christmas at my Mom's, it's my favourite time of the year. Just being with my family without any interuptions with work or commitments is something that rarely happens so we always make the most of it when we are together. Being able to see my Dad and Brother when they visit is always nice and we get to spend time together too since we are all so busy all year. I just wish there would have been one more person there this year.. I was really excited thinking about Harley being able to meet everyone over the Holidays but when she got called away, I instantly knew she would miss it all and it broke me a little. I love being so close with her Dad and Maisie and I want that with my Family and Harley. It's not ideal living so far apart but I know we are both willing to do everything to make this relationship work. She is always telling me how she can't wait to be home with me and it makes my heart glow when she says how she will follow me around where ever I am so we can be together. I've never had someone who is so committed to being together like Harley is. As much as I hate this time being apart, I can't wait to have her here with me again. I know she is due back at the start of January so we are hoping we can see each other before I go back to work full time. She keeps telling me she will still come to L.A even if I am working and the thought of coming home to her every day is making the smile on my face grow just at the thought.

I eventually gave in to my body and managed to get myself out of bed and ready for the day. I hate leaving everything to the last minute so I made plans with Ashley to do my Christmas shopping today so I can make sure I have presents for everyone. It also gives me time to order anything online if I can't find anything today. The twins are in L.A for some work but MK is busy today so it's just me and Ashley shopping. I can't wait to see her, it feels like I haven't seen her in a while, and she will be there to help me with gift ideas. I got a text from Ashley to let me know she is on her way to come get me so I made sure I had everything ready to leave before slipping on my shoes and getting my keys. I opted for some jeans and one of Harley's jumpers today since it is a little cooler in L.A now. I love having Harley's clothes here with me, her jumpers are way too big on me but they keep me warm and remind me of her so I don't care. I made sure I had some glasses and a hat, knowing there will be paparazzi out today and I really don't feel like dealing with them. I took my phone from it's cable and slipped it into my purse before hearing a car outside so I made my way out to meet with Ashley. Thankfully she has her driver today so neither of us have to drive through the traffic. I locked up behind me then made my way down to the car where her driver was waiting with the door open. I thanked him before climbing into the back, instantly being met by Ashley's arms. I hugged her back before settling back into my seat for the drive. "It is so good to see you Sis! How are you? You look good by the way! New jumper?" Ashley gushes like always and it instantly makes my smile only grow.

"It's good to see you too Ash. I'm good how are you doing? How's MK? And not new but.." I can feel my cheeks blushing at the thought of Harley which gives me away. "Let me guess.. Harley's?" She teases and I can't help but laugh lightly as I nod my head. "Your so smitten, I love it. How is she doing?" Ashley asks and I smile at the text I woke up to this morning from her. "She's good. Tired and the heat is killing her slowly but she's good. She's back with everyone else building a school in the Village." I tell her what I know and she quickly smiles at the information. "She's a saint that girl of yours. Too good for this World." Ashley gushes and it just makes me smile so much more. She's right, Harley is incredible and she needs to know it. "I know.. The work she does is incredible. They all work so hard. Oh, take a look at these pictures she sent me." I quickly get my phone to show Ashley the pictures I got yesterday of 7 Section. They are all smiling and laughing with people from the village and it is adorable. Ashley takes my phone and takes a look at the photos, smiling as much as I am. "Ooo, he's hot. Do you think Harley will set me up with one of her Soldiers?" She teases and I instantly take my phone back giving her a look as she just laughs. "What? Come on, you have one! I want one too." She jokes and I can't help but laugh at her playful pout. "Ask her yourself if you want set up.. I know about your group chat with her and MK." I tease back and she quickly laughs and pulls out her phone, no doubt texting Harley as I just laugh at her and admire the photos myself before the car comes to a stop.

"Okay so do you have ideas for everyone or are we winging it?" Ashley asks once we are inside the store. I have some ideas and I have already been looking at some options for what I want to get Harley. "Some.. I have ordered Dad's present already, as well as yours and MK's that you asked for." I explain as I go through my list on my phone. "Oh and I also ordered some clothes for Maisie and I may have went overboard already.." I say shyly and she quickly gives me a knowing look. "Your such a softie Sis. But it's cute and I know Maisie will be over the moon." I smile at Ashley's words before we start to look around together. "What are you getting Harley?" She asks with a teasing tone which I shake my head at before sharing with her my idea. "Well.. Her Dad is a photographer and one day over dinner he told me that she used to help him a lot before she joined the Army. He even showed me some of her work and she is really good, so I thought I could get her a Camera so she can do more when she is home." I say a little unsure but seeing Ashley's beaming smile gives me a little reassurance. "I love that idea!" Ashley says excitedly and it helps me relax. "I have been looking into which cameras are better but I haven't decided on one yet, but I was thinking of asking Stuart his advice too." I explain more and she nods her head. "Good idea. He'll deffinently know best." I smile and make a note to ring him soon before looking back to my list as we start to look around the store, hoping I can get as much as I can today so I'm not rushing around and getting stressed all at the last minute. I like to be organised since my anxiety can get the better if me if I don't stay prepared.

After a couple of hours and a few stores later, I have my hands full with bags but I am nearly done with my list. Ashley has also managed to get a lot done so we decided to break for something to eat. Ashley decided on Italian so we found somewhere and got seated pretty much straight away at a quieter table. We ordered some well deserved glasses of wine and our food before falling into general conversation to catch up on anything we have missed before conversation turns to the Holidays. "So is Mom still complaining about Harley being away for the Holidays?" Ashley teases and I quickly nod my head and laugh at her. "Yeah she was really looking forward to meeting her. I keep telling her we are going to visit as soon as she gets home but it's not good enough apparently." I joke and she giggles into her wine glass. "Sounds like Mom. She is going to love Harley, I can see it already." I can't help but smile so widely feeling the same way. "I know she is going to hold her hostage as soon as she gets there." I joke and we both burst into laughter knowing exactly what Mom can be like. Our food arrives and we carry on talking about little things. After we finish, we order another glass of wine and decide on taking our time, my feet already hurting thinking about doing anymore shopping. "Do you have any plans for when Harley comes home?" Ashley asks with a smirk and I instantly scold her for it, knowing exactly what she was getting at. "Behave! I don't actually.. I just can't wait to see her again when I know she isn't leaving so soon. I hate saying goodbye to her.." I start to feel my smile fading but Ashley quickly notices. "Hey no frowning. She'll be home soon and you can both make up for lost time." I start to smile again at the thought of spending my time with her again, not caring where we will be as long as we are together.

When we finally finish our wine we settle the bill and get back to shopping. It doesn't take us too long to finish what we need to get and by that point, our arms are full with bags with no room for anything else so we call it a day. As we are heading towards the car, we get caught by a group of paparazzi and instantly the flashes are blinding us as they start shouting questions at us both. "Lizzie, where is Harley deployed at?" "Is it true she is a Captain?" "When is Harley due to come home?" "Are you still together?" I ignore them all as Ashley comes close to my side and we bloke them out as much as we can before feeling some come behind us and shield us towards the car. Ashley's driver helps us into the back seats with our bags, making sure to keep us safe before closing the door for us when he checks we are both okay. "I hate paparazzi!" Ashley quickly huffs out and I nod my head in agreement as I take off my glasses and hat and lean back to catch my breathe. I really hate how much they don't appreciate personal space and feel like they can do what they want. Times like this I miss being in London, people are so much more courteous and even when people take pictures, they are not anywhere near as bad as they are here. "You okay Liz?" Ashley checks and I look up and give her a small smile. "Yeah just, catching my breathe." I reply and she reaches out for my hand and squeezes it comfortingly. "Where's a Soldier when we need one to save us huh?" She jokes and I quickly laugh lightly with her. "I know, how inconsiderate of her not being here." I tease back making us both laugh even more as the car begins to drive and I can't help but think if Harley was here, I would feel instantly safe in her arms. No matter what happens.

God I really miss my Soldier..


Normal POV

After we finish for the day, we all pack up and head back to Base for food and sleep. I can't wait to get back to my bunk, my body is killing me right now and I know it needs as much rest as possible. When we get back, we get cleaned up and come back for some food, everyone seems to be as exhausted as I am so there isn't too much conversation around the table. Charlie comes in to check on everyone as he grabs some food for himself before he tells us to call it a night after we are finished. It's still early but we really need as many early nights as we can get. We all get finished and do as Charlie says, heading to the tent to start calming down for the night. I say my goodbyes and head to my room to relax my body as much as I can. Since it's still early, I check my phone for messages, seeing my screen full already. I try and get through as many as I can, making sure to answer everyone before I fall to Lizzie's messages telling me she is shopping with Ashley for Christmas presents today. I send her one in reply, telling her about my day and sending her a picture of the School we are building with some of the kids infront of it before seeing a message from Tom come through, letting me know he is finished shooting for the Holidays. I send him a reply, and before I know it, he sends a text straight back so I ask him what he is doing for the day. He texts back and lets me know he is spending the day in bed before heading out for food with some of the cast later before they all leave for the Holidays. I decide to ask him if he is up for a phone call and his text back just makes me laugh so I make sure I have a decent signal before facetiming him. It doesn't even have chance to ring before Tom's beaming smile is covering my phone screen and his excited voice is filling my room.

Tom - "HEY! It's so good to see your face Harley."

Harley - "Thanks! It's good to see you too Holland. You look tired.. Long days on Set?"

Tom - "Yeah but it's all good. I've loved it so far so I can't complain. What about you, your face is healed up nicely, how's things over there?"

Harley - "Settled down a lot thankfully. We've managed to get some temporary housing up for everyone as well as nearly finishing the School re-build."

Tom - "That's amazing Harley. How's everyone doing?"

Harley - "Good yeah, the heat is a killer but.. Yeah.. You know."

Tom - "What's going on Harley?"

Harley - "Nothing I just.. Something happened and it's caused a little tension, it's stupid but.."

Tom - "Hey calm down Harley. Talk to me, what's going on?"

I take a deep breathe and see Tom move to get more comfortable as I begin to tell him about what happened with Natalia a few days ago. He just sits and listens intently as I make sure to tell him everything before going quiet as he takes a minute to digest everything. "Alright.. Not that I know how it feels out there like you do but it sounds harmless to me Harley. She was upset and was seeking comfort but before anything happened, she realised and stopped herself." I nod my head softly in agreement but my mind is still overthinking everything. "I just, she's keeping her distance now and she's going back into her shell which is the last thing I want to happen. But I have no idea what else I can do.. Then there is Lizzie to worry about and my head is a mess mate." I rush out and he chuckles lightly at me before stopping me from rambling. "Harley, breathe. First off, Lizzie will understand when you tell her. All she wants is honesty from you and you'll give her that without a doubt. Secondly, Natalia will be feeling guilty for the position she put you in that's all. And lastly, STOP GETTING IN YOUR HEAD!" I can't help but laugh at him, knowing he knows me better than anyone and knows exactly what to say to help me. "Your right.. I just, hate tension. But I know I can't force anything either." I huff out and he just smiles. "It'll work out mate, I know you'll sort it. Just give it time." I smile at his comforting words before I change the subject and ask him about what he has been up too with work and being in Atlanta. He quickly falls into easy conversation telling me so much more than he should be but he doesn't even realise so I let him go, feeling better talking to my best friend again like we have never been apart.

When Tom finally stops gushing about Zendaya and what he has been doing with work, he realises how long he has been talking for and laughs at himself before seeing how tired I am feeling. "You need to get some sleep mate." He calls me out and I scoff at him. "Cheers mate, do I really look that bad?" I joke and he quickly laughs along before shaking his head. "You need to take care of yourself Harley. Lizzie is already planning on feeding you up when your home." He teases and I quickly flip him off. "I can't wait for some proper food again to be fair." I add on and he chuckles knowing how much I miss my food whilst I'm away. "Not long mate. Now, go get some rest and I'll hopefully catch you in London after the New Year." I smile at the thought and nod my head. "Hopefully. If not, we'll catch up soon!" He beams a smile as he gets up from his bed. "Can't wait, now go to sleep! And text me when you can." I laugh at his serious look before he breaks it and laughs with me. We say goodbye and come off the phone, my mood lifted instantly after talking with him before I lie back on my bunk, my eyes falling heavy straight away. I can hear muffled voices and music playing next door and smile at them having time to relax before a quiet voice pulls my attention to the door. I sit up slowly and look over, seeing a very nervous looking Natalia peeking her head through my door. "Hey Jones, everything okay?" I ask as I sit up properly on my bunk to give her my full attention. "Yeah uh, can we talk?" She asks shyly. I nod my head softly and wave her inside my room. She comes in carefully and stands awkwardly so I pat the bunk beside me to invite her to sit down with me. She smiles softly and walks over to join me, leaving a small distance between us as she sits down, taking a minute to gather her thoughts before saying anything.

"I know I've said this before but I just wanted to say I am so sorry for what happened the other night when I was upset. I never meant to put you in that kind of position. I don't know what happened.. I was just so in my head about missing home and what has happened here and yeah, I'm sorry Harley." She rambles but I can hear how genuine her words. I let her take a breathe as I digest everything before turning my body to face her properly. Carefully reaching for her hands and pulling her to face me rather than looking at the floor. She lets me pull her to the side and I keep her hands in mine, giving them a gentle squeeze before saying anything. "Natalia, you have nothing to apologise for. These things happen. Especially in these situations. We've all been there and we have all reacted in many different ways. But you didn't let it get the better of you and realised what was happening before it went any further. You need to stop beating yourself up so we can get back on track again." I try and comfort her as best as I can and I catch a stray tear roll down her cheek before she quickly wipes it away then looks up to meet my gaze. "I know I just, I feel so guilty." I nod my head and sigh, hating seeing her like this. "I know but like I said, everyone goes through this at some point. Whether it is breaking down completely or losing control.. Emotions get the best of us but we need to support each other so we don't break. But I can't help you if you keep your distance from me." I say softly and she smiles and nods her head. "I know, I'm sorry for that too Harley. You've been amazing out here and I am so grateful for you." She rambles and I just smile and laugh lightly as Natalia slowly starts to laugh too, relaxing the more she is around me again.

"Come here." I gesture and open out my arms for her. She hesitates for a few seconds before hugging me back. I feel her shoulders relax completely before we pull apart with smiles on our faces. "Now, can we put this behind us and get back to normal again?" I ask and she quickly nods her head and wipes her tears away. "I'd like that. Thank you Harley, for everything." I smile at her kinds words before I try and give her as much comfort as I can so we talk a little about what has been getting to her and sending her emotions all over the place. She manages to open up and we talk things through and I can see her starting to feel a lot better. Eventually though, we both start to feel overly tired so I tell Natalia to go get some rest. I get up and give her another quick hug before she heads off to the door. "Your a really great Captain Harley. Thank you for everything." She says before leaving altogether. I can't help but smile as I head off to wash up and change before coming back to bed. Feeling so much better after the talk with Natalia I know the only thing left to do is explain everything to Lizzie when I am home but that can wait for now. Just over 2 weeks and I'll be home and it can't come quick enough. This Tour has been short but full of everything possible. I am completely drained and ready for home now. I hate knowing I am missing out on Christmas and New Year but I can't wait to see everyone again and make up for lost time. Hopefully we get home whilst everyone is still home for the Holidays rather than being back to work. I just want to be on that plane to L.A and on my way to see Lizzie. I never thought I'd feel so close with someone the way I do Lizzie but it's come so naturally that there is no explaining it. She's it for me.

My World and so much more..


A/N ~~ Love Harley & Tom's relationship so much! Best Friends as well as Family..