For All That It Takes

CHAPTER 33

Someone said that choosing to love a person isn't a choice we make. Because it was fate. Neither you two met up with an ill-fated fate, or you two have met to fullfil each other the longing that both of you have.

But in my philosophy, loving someone is definitely our choice. It was our choice that we make. It was us that chose to love that someone. It was our heart that chooses to beat insanely for that certain person.

And in my case, it was Kier.

Hindi ko makuha kung bakit nila nasasabing tadhana iyon. When in fact, there's nothing real from that bullshit destiny other than toying people.

Ang pagmamahal ng isang tao ay sarili nating desisyon. Puso natin ang humuhusga sa nararamdaman natin. It was always our heart that chooses to love. And we, as the owner of it, feels the love that we had inside us.

We may sometimes begin to being greedy, selfish and foolish for our love. But certainly, no one has the right to question our actions for we only know on how to love that way. We love them even if it takes everything.

Marahil dahil sa pagmamahal na mayroon ako para kay Kier, ay magiging isa ako sa mga taong nagiging tanga at mahina. But it's not only that, because I love.

I was the woman who has nothing to be proud of. Selling my body to live everyday that passes by. I was one of those people who haven't dignity. I was a filthy immoral woman who was nothing but a pure shame.

"What are you thinking? Hmm?" I was back on my track when I heard Kier's deep voice from my back.

Inikot ko ang ulo ko upang lingunin siya. And there, I saw him stirring Gael's milk on the glass.

"Wala naman," sagot ko.

Inangat ko ang paa ko mula sa sahig at ipinatong iyon sa malambot na sofa bago pumangalumbabang tinitigan siya.

"Iniisip ko lang..."

Nag-angat siya ng tingin sa akin.

"About?" he asked.

I keep staring at him for seconds before I opened my mouth to speak again.

"Your tattoo back then," I said.

Nakita ko kung paano maglikot bigla ang kanyang mga mata nang banggitin ko iyon.

"I saw it written on a cursive font but..." I think I saw it Amore. It was Amore's name...

"Pinatanggal ko na," aniyang ipinagtaka ko.

"Ha? Bakit naman?" Kuryusong tanong ko.

It was Amore's name so why would he get rid of it? Pangalan iyon ng babaing una niyang minahal kaya bakit—

"Mahal kita," sagot niya.

I-Is that his reason? Because he love me?

Hindi ako kaagad nakapagsalita nang sagutin niya ang tanong ko. I know that he love me. He already said it many times. Proved his love but still... I am not yet used of him saying that sincerely.

"K-Kier..." I uttered his name.

"I love you so what's the reason for keeping that tats?"

It true. Alam ko naman 'yon...

"But still..."

"It wasn't your name. And I don't think writing your name on my skin is a requirement so I can prove my love for you."

What?

"It's not what I mean, Kier—"

"Amore... Her was only proven by ink, Haier. But for you? Hindi ko gusto ang isulat kahit isang letra ng pangalan mo. Because my love for you is surely infinite."