Sailed (GxG)

19: Day

Marthae's Pov

"Is there a problem anak?" I heard my dad asked from behind. I also felt his presence coming so I didn't bother looking at his direction.

I am currently staring at the starless sky, feeling so empty inside.

My dad called me and asked if we could have dinner in the house, I agreed because he told me he won't be inviting any guest. Except for the both of us.

Sabi niya kasi gusto niya akong makasama bago ang araw ng kaarawan ko at sabi niya din na gusto niyang kasama ko siya sa pagsalubong nito.

He promised that he won't held a grand party nor gathering, so I trusted him. I saw how he became a better man for himself and for us during the whole dinner, which made me happy.

But I still feel incomplete. I sighed once again and minutes later I felt my tears forming, trying to escape from my eyes.

Malapit na matapos ang school year, isang buwan nalang at sa loob ng ilang buwan ay daig ko pa ang broken hearted na 'di makamove on sa ex dahil sa tinding pag-eemote.

I tried and tried and tried to talk with Zen again, but still failed. Kaya pinagbigyan ko na. Umiwas nalang din ako, kahit mahirap.

"Why are you crying?" My thoughts were cut off when I heard my dad. I didn't even notice that he is already in front of me.

He held my both cheeks as he look at me full of concern. Nasa veranda ako ngayon ng kwarto ko, at sumunod lang si dad sa'kin dito.

Umiling lang ako dito at sinubukang patigilin ang luha pero hindi din nagtatagumpay.

I felt my dad wiped my cheeks and pulled me into a hug that made me cry more.

"You can tell me everything anak." He whispered ngunit umiling lang ako ulit at mas hinigpitan ang yakap sa kan'ya.

I need someone right now.

Hanggang ngayon naguguluhan padin ako. Hindi siya nagbigay ng explinasyon at hindi ko mahanap ang tamang dahilan kung bakit nagkagan'on siya bigla.

Naintindihan kong hindi niya ako magugustuhan, hindi naman 'yan ang hiningi ko sa kan'ya. Pinipilit ko parin ang sarili ko na paniwalaang may kinalaman ito sa pag-alis niya ng bansa.

Sa tuwing nagtatama ang aming tingin ay ako nalang ang umiiwas, ayokong makita niya ang kapaguran at pagmumugto ng aking mata.

Sometimes I'll also see her being lost by her thoughts that gave me a chance to stare at her without being caught. And everytime that happens, I can see through her eyes that there is something going on.

Her eyes are full of unknown emotions and her eyes tells something that she can't tell verbally, but I can't pinpoint what is it. I can also see the tiredness from my favorite pair of eyes owned by the woman I love.. If only she'll let me again, I'll do my best to give her the rest and comfort she needed.

This is my first time loving someone and no one even warned me that it would be this hard and painful..

Sana man lang may nilagay kayong warning sign diba para maging aware naman ako.

I'm still hoping.. Hangga't hindi pa siya kasal, hindi ko siya titigilan.

As I felt a warm hand caressing my back, it somehow calmed me.

"Hush now, dad's always here." After he said that, I startled as I heard loud bangs fron above. I didn't notice how many hours had past.

My eyes become teary again because of the mix emotions I felt.