~𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕝𝕠𝕧𝕖 𝕓𝕖𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕕 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕟𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕖~

struggle

Tw: bulimia, purging

Ever since the triple threat match I had been in a lot of pain. My left knee was in agony every time I placed any sort of pressure to it,but I hated the doctors so I refused to admit that I was hurting no matter how obvious it was.

"Im fine" I said to my girlfriend, who was stood over me. I was sat on the floor of the gym, clutching onto my leg. "Stop lying Syd, you're hurt" the tall Aussie said crouching down and holding her hand out to me. I looked at her hand but didn't take it, trying to prove the point that I was okay. I was of course lying but I couldn't say that because I really did not want to sit in a hospital.

After the gym I made the stupid mistake of falling asleep in the car. I woke up in the hospital parking lot with demi sat in the drivers seat. "Demi-" "I know that you've had bad experiences here, believe me I know that but I can't just sit around and watch you struggle anymore." she looked at me with deep concern and I didn't know how to say no to her so I gave in. She let out a sigh of relief and helped me into the reception where I was made to fill out forms. We sat in the waiting room for about an hour or so when a nurse came over to us with a worried expression. "Hi, are you alright, you look a little pale" she said to me placing her hand on my forehead. I nodded "yeah, I just haven't eaten much today.." I said looking up at her, she nodded at me left for a brief moment and came back with a muffin and a cup of water. "I need you to eat just to avoid any further complications" shit. I looked at demi with worry in my face but she nodded at me and squeezed my hand to make me feel a little better.

I sat for a solid 5 minutes just staring at the food in front of me before deciding to pick at it. As I ate I felt as though all eyes were on me, I couldn't do it. I put the muffin in the bin and after asking for directions to a bathroom, purged everything that I had eaten. I knew that demi was stood right outside the door, she had heard everything and I knew she wasn't happy about it. She was stood right next to the door and prevented me from leaving, pushing me back into the bathroom. "I thought you said you weren't gonna do that anymore!" She said to me after closing the door behind her. I just looked down in silence, she was right, I told her that I was better and I wasn't going to purge again, but the feeling of everyone watching me was too much to handle. After explaining myself she understood a little better about why I broke my promise and sat me back down in the waiting room. Another hour passed before I got called in, demi had noticed that I was relying a lot on her support, the pain my leg was already in had magnified after the gym I just didn't say anything, plus I was pretty faint from purging and now having an empty stomach.

After a brief consultation I was taken to the x-ray where the doctors found out something that was worse than I had thought. "To be quite honest Miss Davidson, we aren't sure how you have lasted over a week. Your tibia has shifted upward, shattering part of your femur. We need to take the shattered pieces out of your knee, push your tibia back into place and you'll be in a brace and crutches for at least 7 weeks, with no wrestling. We can admit you as early as tonight and we have what the all clear from your mother and relatives but it is still your decision" I stared at the doctor in complete shock. "No. No way. I'll lose my job! Put me in a brace I'll be fine." Demi looked at me sternly "Syd you won't lose anything. Not even your title. They can't take it away unless you give permission and I'd much rather you have the operation than sit in agony for much longer, please." I sighed and nodded "yeah. Okay" a nurse gave me another form, signing my signature confirming that I was going to go through with the surgery.

*time skip *

I had been recovering for 2 weeks now, today was the day that I was going home. The stitches in my knee had been removed and I was now in a huge brace and had crutches, which I would have to use for at least 5 more weeks for my knee to be completely healed. I was sat in the pick up space for 20 minut3s when demi stepped out of the car to help me get into it. "I've missed you" she said to me "You visited me literally every day." I chuckled. "Yeah but I've had no cuddle buddy in bed..." She said rubbing my thigh.

She drove us home, picking food up for us and stopping me from leaving. "Syd" I turned to demi "yeah" she sighed "Can you be honest with me?" She said looking directly at me. I nodded and she spoke again "Did you purge again while you were in hospital?" Her words were serious and she wanted the truth. "You want the truth?" To which she nodded. "I tried, once or twice. But I was stopped" I felt so guilty admitting that I had attempted to break the promise yet again. She nodded "thank you for being honest" was all she said before helping me out of the car.

I was bombarded with hugs and loves by Izzy and trav the second I walked through the door. It was nice being home. But I knew that demi was struggling. She needed a new place because of her dogs Barry and luna, they had been left with Dimitri for too long and although he had kept tabs on them for her, she wanted to keep them with their mom. We had been looking for places for a while and had no luck. But we'd find one eventually