𝐥𝐮𝐧𝐚𝐫 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐬 | carlisle cullen (3)

( alice's letter )

My dearest Alice,

If it was not for you I don't know where I would be. Sad, alone, angry. You changed my life in the best way possible and I owe you the world, I'm sorry I couldn't stick around long enough to give it to you. Your beauty, elegance and joyousness have brought me so much pleasure. Your constant smile and the way you dance to your own song.

Your are one of a kind, so unique in a world of copies and the way you shine is a way others wish to shine. Alice you are perfect in every sense of the word and you deserve everything.

I'm not sure what you saw coming for my future, I still don't know how my end is coming but I can feel it. I fear your gift will provide you with too much information but whatever happens I hope you know that I wasn't scared, that I couldn't have done anything to stop it. I hope you didn't see what happened to me, what will happen to me. That is all I fear, I know your gift can be a terrible gift to bear.

Whatever you see, whatever you think you understand please remember me as I was and not the person I may have been twisted to be. One of my favourite memories is still that day we put those bugs in the car, I hold onto that sometimes. The way you laughed, I felt accomplished, as though I was finally on the way to being a good mother. I know you'd say I never failed, that I was perfect from the beginning and I love you endlessly for that. Alice you changed my life, my world and I will miss you endlessly.

I don't think I could ever thank you enough for what you did for me. Even though that day you came to drag me to that New Years party it was under the hope you'd be saving Carlisle, in the process you gave me everything. For as long as I can remember I've always dreamt of family, even in the years I didn't believe I could dream any more. You gave me that, the most perfect family I could ever have wished for. I know even without me in the picture, you'll stay together.

I hope you are granted everything you could possibly wish for and then a little bit more. I know you'll still dance, you'll still smile, you'll still laugh. I'm sorry I couldn't see it one last time.

All my love,

Este.