Unexpected you

Chapter 3

Five hours later, we arrived back home. Many bags on hand and feeling quite tired, but good. I got my nails done, a haircut, gym shoes and three outfits. Boy, I sure know how to stretch a dollar. I think to myself as I lay my shopping bags on the dining room table. I need to make time to thank Mr Ortega. My full day of pampering, which I never get to do, was made possible because of his generosity. How do you feel? Elaina asks as she hands me a glass full of ice and water. I feel great E! Thanks again for pushing me to get out. I really needed that. Of course Cheyenne, anytime. And I'm so happy that you decided to come along, because I was prepared to drag you out of the house by your feet, should you have resisted.  Oh really? I asked my friend as I carefully studied all of my receipts. Yes, I was! Elaina responds with a serious look on her face. Taking time for yourself is so important, Cheyenne. I hope the new you remembers that during your journey to become a stronger, and more confident woman.

Elaina is right. I've constantly put myself on the back burner, and I never give myself an opportunity to enjoy the good things in life. I'm not doing that anymore. That old Cheyenne will be placed inside of a box, sealed, and never seen again. It's time to make way for a more balanced and a highly confident me. We should plan another visit to the hair salon next month. Elaina suggested as she browsed through her purchases. I need to see a real haircut on you, because whatever you had done today, isn't working girlfriend! What the hell are you talking about E? Look at my hair! It's cut and treated, and clearly an improvement from before! I am looking at it Cheyenne. Its looks the same way it did when we left the damn house this morning. You cut two freaking inches off! When your hair is past your hips, two inches does not  make a difference! I told you—you should have gone with a bob haircut!

Elaina has been pushing the "Bob" haircut on me for months now. Claiming that I have the perfect neck and face structure for it, but I refuse to cut my hair that short. Especially when my long hair has always been the only part of my body that I was ever okay with. I've never wanted to part with it, and I still don't. Growing up with a twin who had a pretty face, gorgeous legs, and a perfect ass—really contributed to my lack of self confidence. To make matters worse,  I had the longest pair of chicken legs, size nine feet, and big hands. I was  definitely an odd looking teen, and It's safe to say that between the ages of  twelve through sixteen, I was at my most awkward stages of life. Well..... as far as appearances went. My sister always got all of the best compliments and attention. You're  gorgeous, your hands are so petite and beautiful, you look like a model, and so on and so on and so on. The compliments were constant with her and all I ever heard was— you have nice hair and you're such a sweet girl. I guess they're both good compliments, but they didn't exactly make me feel pretty.

What's up girls? Jason walks in hollering. Party at your casa tonight?  He asks with a wink. Oh, hey Jason—I'm not sure. You'll have to ask Elaina about that. You know how she feels about having too many people in this small apartment. I reminded him. Jason is Elaina's "friend with benefits" and one of the only few friends that I have. He is the sweetest guy that I know, and I've always felt like I could trust him. And trust me when I say, that is a big deal for me. The guy is always looking out for me, and has taken on the role of big brother as the time has gone by. According to Shawn, Jason and Steve were the only guy friends I was allowed to have. And did I know that Shawn made them look out for me and watch my every move? Yes—I did. But they were good to me and they never made me feel like I couldn't be myself around them, so I was fine with the arrangement. When I broke up with Shawn, I was so afraid of losing their friendship, and going back to having just one friend. I didn't...and I was so happy about that.

Sometimes, I think back to all the times when Steve would encourage me to leave Shawn, and I cringe at the thought of what could've happened. Of what can happen should Shawn ever find out. Because it's no secret that Shawn has had plenty of guys beaten up for saying things to me, or about me. But Steve and Jason were never okay with Shawn's aggressive behavior. Especially towards me. They have both been friends with Shawn since the third grade, and they were the only two people I knew that could calm Shawn down. Every time they saw him getting physical with me, they would stick around and try to help me in anyway they could. That was such a big deal for me, and meant so much more than they could ever imagine. Especially when it saved me from a busted lip or black eye.