Sohams personal Diary

Soham's weekly diary! 24August'22

24 August 2022, Wednseday

915pm-959pm

Dear future Soham,

Sing us a song, you're the piano man, sing us a song tonight.

He likes her, or he thinks he does. He also doesn't know. He had something for her forever but he never really expressed it tho. Now he is dating her...and it's going fairly well.

He says to her, "Today I got belted"

"How?", she says, as she usually does.

Should I tell her? he thinks to himself. He decided to.

He starts, "That girl in my class? Anusha Verma? She got selected as the Vice President for the Model Parliament.." He continues, "I really wanted to watch the Model Parliament and especially her speech because she's super intelligent and I want to learn and see how it goes." His class was one of the first to go and watch it but during that time they were only setting up. So he couldn't. He had spent the first 4 periods there sitting with his friends waiting for the heavily decorated programme to start. When it did start, however; that's when his math class started.

"Sahana ma'am was looking at us from there condescendingly and asking us to return. All of us reached class and then I told ma'am..." "Ma'am I want to watch the Model Parliament."

"Why?", she questioned.

He replied, "Ma'am, Anusha is there, she is our classmate and she's the VP there. Do you understand how big of a post that is?"

"So?", she replies. Replies he, "Ma'am so I want to watch it, I mean..."

"Soham don't speak to me in that tone"

Reducing his tone, he tries to argue back. Lower again.

His friends surrounding him are telling him to stop. Telling him to shut up but he can't hear them. He goes on. Then she says,

"Get out of my class"

"Ma'am but"

"I really don't want you in my class, get out."

He walked out of the door. He was shaking. This was one of the teachers that liked him. In his parent-teacher meeting, the very same teacher praised him as if he was her son. But now universes felt different. Never had this happened. He was thrown out of the class for the first time and she scolded him for the very first time also. 

He went to watch the Model Parliament still. He sat there looking at it. Thinking about what would he do next. Seeing the model parliament pissed him off to some extent. Because this boy is fluent in the dramatic arts, the way people were delivering their speeches infuriated him. He sat and wondered why that particular delegate had paused on the wrong word. He sat there but Anusha Verma's chance hadn't come yet.

The whole maths period got over and next in line were 2 continuous periods of Chemistry. The chemistry teacher...is his favourite. He likes her and she likes him too. He really wanted to see the performance, so he didn't even go to class. One of his classmates, Souvik Dutta was bunking Chemistry and started hanging out with Soham. They both sat watching the Model Parliament, then went out to take a walk in the school. Coming back one of Soham's friends needed to film her friend speaking. She asked Soham to film it and Soham requested a puff for return. He recorded the small video she needed and got a puff which was there for the teachers and the delegates for hardly any work. Souvik and Soham took a walk again, sharing the puff and then coming back just in time to watch Anusha's performance. Anusha was first escorted by NCC cadets and then she delivered her speech. Out of everyone, Anusha had the best speech. By a high margin, the way she spoke was out of this world. Soham really respects Anusha. Not only because she is the class teacher, but in other ways too. Her social talk is not some stupid rant. She speaks as though she is very intelligent and naturally Soham feels like she is one of the people who will go ahead in life and leave the others behind. That's why he wants to know what she is doing and how good at it she is. Soham had also applied for the Model Parliament but was unfortunately not selected. Soham was happy that he tried but sad that he didn't get selected. It was motivational to see what he saw.

Now he is sitting with Souvik, they both cannot go back to class, because then the teacher will catch them. So they just sit there. For some reason, all their subject teachers know Soham. There is their Biology teacher standing a little far away. Soham realises that she has spotted him. He looks straight, taking the odds that there is probably a chance that she hasn't seen him. But she did.

She comes from behind. Taps his shoulder.

Soham looks back.

"What are you doing here?", Manaswini ma'am asks.

Soham replies, "Ma'am I came to watch the Model Parliament." In a hurried and worried tone.

"Where is the rest of your class then? So, you're whole class is sitting inside and studying and you're here?", she states, something is about to come.

"Ma'am I wanted to watch, and the teacher threw me out so I...", Said Soham. In hindsight he thinks, why did I tell her that?

Then she says,"Go back to your class."

She doesn't bat an eye at Souvik because she doesn't know that he is in our class. Soham feeling a little guilty goes to class. His friends open the door. He takes two steps in and...

"With whose permission have you come in? Soham, Get out of the class."

Rajni ma'am said that.

Soham is now worried. He goes out of class. Two of his friends come out and talk to him about how he f*cked up with Sahana ma'am and that he is now going to get f*cked again. Soham stands there. Analysing the situation. Thinking about what is going to happen. His friends told him to say sorry to Sahana ma'am and Rajni ma'am both. A few minutes later Rajni ma'am comes out of class.

She tells Soham what is he doing, If he wants to get into the "Bilal" category. She tells him that there's no point in this. His name is going to go to the coordinator now. And tells him to think over it.

Soham is sad. He disappointed Rajni ma'am once with his pre-midterm paper. The way that she had said, "I didn't expect this from you." had really hit him hard. 

This was the second time something like this happened and he doesn't want the relationship he has with his ma'am to go into the gutter.

He sits in class during lunch, reflecting on what happened these past few periods.

He goes to take a walk with his friend, Yuvam. He tells Yuvam what happened. They go to Sahana ma'am to apologise. Soham is sh*tting his pants. Not knowing what is he going to say.

He goes to her and says, sorry ma'am, I didn't mean to...

And she says, "I didn't expect this from you, now go to class"

He finishes his story. He probably expected some kind of sympathetic response from his girlfriend. She didn't quite get the gravity of the situation. Soham moves on thinking about what happened between a couple of his class.

N and M. They are absolutely cute together, it makes me happy to see them both together. They kiss all the time and are so close. But I haven't seen them in a while. Today during the MP when my class and I were sitting together and chatting. I asked N how it was going and he told me, not good. He said that he wanted a break from the relationship and that it was not going well. He felt she didn't listen to him and was not there emotionally. Soham felt sad, seeing them both made him happy and N telling him that he wanted to pause on the relationship was like seeing in a pond as a reflection. All of my friends keep asking me to hold her and that stuff. But I want to take it slow. I don't want to end up like N. I know him properly and he has seen N and M. He wants to have what they have but now that they don't have anything. I  don't want to end up there. I will take things slowly with Amogha. I like her. I think I do. I don't know anymore. After my story I felt like what happened with N is happening to me. I am not going to jump to conclusions. It was probably just for that moment. This will probably not happen again, even if it does it's not a problem. 

Yours truthfully,

Soham