Thoughts and Things

Like a parrot

Where is this all coming from?

She sure as hell never cared before,

she never thought to ask-

it sounds like she's reading questions from a book,

like she's reading off definitions-

(What was that book in that movie called?

"Coping with a troubled child",

or something like that?

We watched that movie together,

she saw it,

didn't she get why that was upsetting,

didn't she understand that the girl was angry

because she found out that her parents were keeping that book,

because she was the troubled child and she knew it,

can't she understand that-?)

"Where is all of this coming from?"

"I've been going to counseling."

(Isn't that the same goddamn thing?

What else would you go there for,

if not because of me?)

Or is she just reading from a book?

That's what it sounds like.

She's reading hollow advice and memorizing it

and then repeating it to me like a parrot,

like a parrot who can learn to make certain sounds

so that it really does look and sound like the parrot is speaking;

but in reality,

the parrot has no understanding of the noises it makes.

So the parrot can chatter all day long,

and maybe it will even make the right sounds at the right time

and you'll think you're having a conversation,

you'll think the parrot understands you-

but it doesn't.

It's just a bird.

It can make sounds and it can give off the appearance

of being able to understand,

but it will never understand why

you keep making those strange sounds and call it "speaking".