Imperial Affairs (Levi X Reader) AU

20. Recklessness

Reader's POV

"Did Mother not mean anything more to you than just a peace treaty between the two Empires?!" I raised my voice at Father which was highly impudent of me but I did it anyway because of my rage at the time that Christa died.

"She did," Father answered, "She meant a lot to me but I don't see why we are discussing this now."

"Because you killed Christa. She was exactly like Mother and if you couldn't be merciful to her, Mother meant nothing to you," Tears flowed out of my eyes, I couldn't stop them then.

"I had Christa executed because she had Udo killed. That's a crime."

"A crime grave enough to have the last traces of someone like Mother destroyed? Will you do the same thing to me if I do something?! And you won't have anything to remember Mother with!"

"Your mother wouldn't want her children to commit crimes."

"And neither would she want them to die."

"Your mother was a special person. She didn't even know me when she agreed to be my consort because she wanted to protect the peace between the Empires like it has been for centuries. She wanted you both to survive. She wanted you to win the crown and protect your sister," Father explained "But, that does not mean that if Christa commits a crime then I will just let it be."

"Why didn't you let me say anything?"

"Christa would've been executed whether or not you said anything. You saying anything wouldn't help Christa and only put you in trouble for defending the killer of a member of the Imperial family. I hate pointless deaths."

"Why did you make me watch it?!"

"Watch what?" Father made me say it.

"Christa's death! Why did you make me see it?!"

"I have watched many people die. I have lost many more and not been near them at the time of their deaths. My father, mother, step-mother, Historia and many others. And after all that, now I'm strong. To be an Emperor, you have to be strong. To be strong you had to watch that."

"But why-?"

"Stop that. I don't need to answer any of your questions," Father finally became too angry to control himself. After all, he had also lost his daughter. I didn't realise that then.

"But you-!"

Shunk

The syringe pierced the side of my neck as Mikasa injected the sedative into me. I immediately stopped talking and my senses slowly went numb. I couldn't stand anymore so Mikasa held me in her arms to prevent me from falling. I was semi-conscious so I could still hear them.

"My deepest apologies, Your Majesty. Y/N was pushed to say this by her emotions. Once she comes back to her senses, I'm sure that she will regret what she said. Please excuse her," Mikasa covered for me.

"I understand. Take her back to her palace and make sure she gets some rest."

"Hah," I remembered what happened that day when Mikasa had to sedate me. I breathed out before putting the cigarette between my fingers to my mouth and smoking like I did whenever I was stressed.

Or just whenever I wanted to.

I was standing on my balcony, in my nightdress without my disguise. I knew I shouldn't be out of my chamber walls without my disguise especially in the day after all, I could only keep the ghost lie going on for so long but I didn't care enough because of my foul mood.

It was chilly out. But not too cold. Just cold enough to make me shiver in this thin nightdress of mine. It was cloudy outside. The weather was just how I liked it though my mood was too dull to enjoy it.