The DILF (Sebastian Vettel)

1. Going It Alone

Switzerland, March 2023

"No Oliver! What have I told you about pulling the flowers off of the plants?" Seb scolded his son as the blonde, curly haired three year old continued to behead the flowers in the flower pots outside the back door. "Oliver! No!"

The child ran off down the garden, shrieking with laughter. Seb sank down onto the concrete step and groaned loudly. What did he have to do to get Oliver to listen to him?

"It's ok Daddy. He's only little. He will learn," came a soft, gentle voice. A little hand rested on his shoulder. Myah, always the voice of reason. How was she only eight years old?

The girl sat down on the step besides her father.   She began fiddling with the end of her blonde braid. 

"Daddy, I was thinking. Wouldn't it be nice if we could go on a picnic at the weekend? Remember that place you and Mummy used to take us where there's that big lake and we used to paddle in the water."

Seb sighed as he heard his daughter mention her mother.    It didn't happen often.  He'd hoped that they had begun to forget about her, just like she had forgotten about them.  

It would be three years in September since Harmony had walked out on him and the kids.   She hadn't seen them once since.  True, he'd left a voicemail telling her she wouldn't be coming near them again, but he'd been angry.  He hadn't meant it.   She was their mother at the end of the day.  The only reason he wanted the kids to forget her was so they forgot the fact that she didn't want them anymore. She hadn't even tried to see them or contacted him to ask how they were.   She'd just sent her brothers to collect the rest of her things.

The first few months had been the worst.   He'd had to try and explain to the kids that their Mummy wouldn't be living with them anymore, he'd had to deal with their tears and Myah's nightmares whilst dealing with his training, his racing and his own feelings.  Sure,  things hadn't been great between him and Harmony but they'd been together for nine years, he still had feelings for her. And on top of that he'd had to deal with his decision to retire from Formula 1. 

He could have stayed, his mother had said she'd have come and had the kids while he was away, but he'd known they needed stability.   They'd needed him there.   Being a Formula 1 driver was time consuming, a Ferrari Formula 1 driver even more so.   He hadn't taken long to make his decision. He'd immediately called off talks about a new contract and two days after Monza he'd informed Mattia that he would be leaving at the end of the season.

He missed it so much. He couldn't believe how much. Racing had been part of his life for so long and now he didn't have it he felt like he didn't know who he was any more. Sure, it had been the right thing to do, and he'd do the same again, but he had struggled to let go.

Even now three years later he still felt something was missing in his life. He watched every single Grand Prix on the television. It pained him seeing Charles and Carlos taking the fight to Red Bull and Mercedes. It should have been him and Charles!

"Daddy?" He realised that Myah was still waiting for him to answer. He looked at her and smiled.

"Maybe in the Summer Pumpkin. It's quite a drive and the weather's not great yet. In the Summer we could perhaps find somewhere to go camping and make a weekend of it."

They were already going to Majorca for a week in August, but the truth was he was hoping that Myah would forget about the lake. He didn't want to go there. It held too many memories.

"Excuse me!" shouted his middle child, Heidi, pushing past the two of them on the step. She ran down the garden and began to chase her brother.

Seb smiled. He really was blessed. He had to stop being selfish and moping around. These kids were amazing, and they were his. Sure, he had days when he struggled, but everyone had days like that sometimes.