The DILF (Sebastian Vettel)

48. Desperation

Seb sat on the edge of his bed trying to concentrate on his breathing. He felt like he was about to snap. Today marked a week since this nightmare began, a week since Christian had snatched Casey and torn their family apart.

Savannah was still in hospital. She was making progress and the doctors were confident that she would be discharged after her next CT scan, which would be either that afternoon or the following morning. He'd be relieved to have her home, although he had no idea how they would explain her injuries to the children. They still didn't know the truth about their sister's disappearance.

There was a knock on the bedroom door.

"Come in," he called. It opened and Heidi walked in, still in her pony themed pyjamas. Seeing the ponies reminded him of Barney. Thinking of Barney reminded him of the day Casey had been taken, of how Myah had been pestering him to go and see their pony.

"Morning sweetheart. How are you? Did you sleep well?" Heidi crossed the room and pulled herself up onto the bed next to her father.

"Daddy, has Sav left us like our mother did?" His heart broke hearing her words.

"No!" he exclaimed. "Sav wouldn't leave us. Sav loves us all very much. She's just a bit poorly right now."

"Then why can't we see her? I could give her a hug. She always hugs me when I'm poorly, and it makes me feel a bit better." Seb felt his eyes filling with tears. Why hadn't it occurred to him that the kids might think they'd been abandoned? He pulled Heidi onto his lap.

"I promise you that she hasn't left us. She will be home soon. The truth is sweetheart, Sav had a bit of an accident. She hurt her head and the doctors have said she must have lots of rest."

"What about Casey? Where is she? I miss her." He had no idea how to explain Casey's absence. He'd just told them she was away for a while, and they'd not questioned him further.

"Casey is..." His phone rang. He breathed a sigh of relief. "I have to answer this," he told her. "Why don't you go downstairs and put the television on? I'll be down soon." Heidi slid off of his lap and walked across the room. He looked at his phone. It was his mother.

"Hello?"

"Sebastian, any news?"

"Nothing. I'm beginning to wonder if they're even looking."

"Of course they are. They'll find her." Seb clenched his free hand into a fist. He could feel his emotions all welling up inside him. He couldn't take much more of this. The feelings of guilt were eating away at him. He should have been there, he should have protected them. If anything happened to Casey it would be on him. Savannah would hate him. He'd lose her, he'd lose Max, he'd lose Eva.

"Mother, I can't talk right now. I have to get dressed and head over to the hospital."

"Ok son, I just wanted to see how you were. Give Savannah our love."

"I will." He hung up. He knew if his mother had her own way she'd have come to stay, but he'd told her not to. The house already felt overcrowded with Clive, Eleanor and Daisy staying there. And the truth was he couldn't face his mother wrapping him up in cotton wool.

He began to flick through photos on his phone, until he came to one of him and Casey. It had been taken in Italy at the lake. He was holding her in his arms and she had her arms wrapped around his neck. They were both smiling brightly. How had the lake been just two weeks ago? he asked himself. It felt like a lifetime ago.

A sob burst from him, his phone fell from his hand and onto the carpet. "Casey," he cried. It was as if a dam had burst. Sure,  he'd cried plenty since she'd been taken, but nothing like this. He cried and he cried, his whole body shaking violently.