Silhouette | Suicidal Todoroki x Bakugou

3 | Masking Grief

Shouto Todoroki

Todoroki had arranged for his sister Fuyumi to watch Mai for a few hours so he could exist in a space that was not a permanent reminder of his wife. Fuyumi was ecstatic to have the opportunity to bond with Mai, and she'd assured Todoroki that she was more than happy to take care of Mai if he was busy. Thus, roughly an hour after making spaghetti for Mai's dinner, Todoroki heard a knock at the door.

Fuyumi, Todoroki thought as he unlocked the front door and pulled it open. Oh.

"Hi, Shouto!" hummed Fuyumi, who embraced her youngest brother with open arms. "I'm so excited to see Mai. I got your text, and I stopped everything I was doing." She released Todoroki and stepped inside while the latter closed the door. "But how's everything going? Again, if you ever need any help or need someone to take care of Mai, I've got you covered, okay?"

I feel pathetic. Todoroki nodded at his sister and motioned for her to follow him into the kitchen. I want to come back home and see Momo waiting for me. I want to come back home to her, just like before. But I'm never going to see her again... He plastered on a smile once he rounded the corner into the kitchen.

"Hi, Mai!" Fuyumi greeted Mai, who was sitting at the dining table with her pink plush duck. "Aunty Fuyumi's here!" She briskly walked up to Mai and wrapped her arms around her.

"Hi, Aunty Fuyumi," Mai chuckled. "Do you like Mr. Duck? Mom gave it to me before she left." She held her plush duck up to Fuyumi.

I feel...I don't even know, Todoroki internally muttered before gently grasping Mai's hand and waving goodbye to her. Bye, Mai. I want to spend more time with you, but I just can't right now.

"Bye, Dad."

With one final wave, Todoroki departed for the bar nearest his house. He'd always been abstemious with alcohol, and even in his college days, he never attended any drinking parties. Overall, Todoroki wasn't the fondest person of alcohol, but he found himself craving the murky buzz that came with it.

Dim orange lights illuminated the inside of the bar enough to see without the fear of running into someone or something, but dim enough to allow everything to be bathed in shadow. A crowd of perhaps thirty people was in the bar in total, but Todoroki anticipated more would arrive in a few hours; he intentionally decided that he would have a few drinks sooner rather than later.

Seating himself at the bar table at an open spot at the far end of it from the entrance, he began to ponder his options. He'd never particularly strayed from IPAs, and he was repulsed by the thought of getting wasted and having to return home to his daughter and sister. So, Todoroki preemptively decided on his drink.

I'll just have one. Enough to get a good feeling out of it, but not enough to come home drunk. I'd never forgive myself if I made horrible decisions around Mai from being intoxicated. I already know what it was like with Endeavor. I'm not having Mai go through that.

Once Todoroki noticed that the bartender was finishing up with the woman a few empty seats away from him, he straightened his posture and rehearsed his order in his head. Yet, as the bartender slowly encroached on Todoroki's peripheral vision, Todoroki felt his chest tighten.

Why am I struggling so much just to get myself to speak? Todoroki couldn't help but wonder as the bartender reached him. Oh. He's speaking.

"What can I get started for you?" queried the ash-blond bartender in a low, gravelly voice.

An IPA, Todoroki wanted to say while glancing at the piercings in the bartender's left ear. He looks nice. IPA. Name tag... Bakugou? IPA. IPA.