Late night drives

XIII : Empty

Where do I start? Where were we at a time like this? I clear my throat. I see Joshua pale with embarrassment. We stand here for a moment before jumping at the slamming of the door thanks to the wind. I completely forgot to close it. Just like I completely forgot that my mother would be home early today.

"Oh, hey mom."

"Matthy." Her voice melts the glacier that had risen between us and her. Her gaze soothes as she looked at Joshua. She gets up and walks over to him.

" Hm, this is my friend ..."

"Joshua, nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you as well dear. I am relieved that Matthy is finally introducing me to a friend."
The two began to smile like little children in front of their Christmas presents. Joshua seemed moved. He looked at my mother with a feeling of longing. Seconds pass so I decide to break the silence with a throat clearing - they turn to look at me Finally. I didn't know mom would like to have another son.

Once I have regained their attention I head towards the kitchen taking a worm of water I notice an envelope on the counter. as I was going to take possession of the letter my mother suggested that we eat a little. Yes. No. We responded simultaneously. I was far too tired even to eat, so I am going right to my room. Climbing the stairs I heard my mother burst out laughing. I hadn't heard him laugh like that in a long time. the house had suddenly become brighter. The shadows that haunted the corridor seemed to have disappeared, and after a long time, I can freely walk in front of his door.

I stop just in front of the big wooden door. I turn the lock and my stomach twists. Already two years since the announcement of this atrocious news has completely turned our lives upside down. A sudden wave of emotion overwhelms me. my throat tightens as I push open the door. There is dust everywhere, on the furniture, and the perfectly tidy bed. Everything is immaculate and in place. Yet this room is lifeless, dull, and cold. I open the closet, it's practically empty. Only a few clothes remain that my mother probably didn't dare to get rid of. Whether she gives them away, throws them away, or burns them, I don't care, it's not like he's coming back anyway. I collapse on the bed. It's been a long time, three years.

I should have already ended my mourning, shouldn't I?
I close my eyes for a moment. I can still hear Ricky's cries of pain begging them to stop... and I, like a coward, a real coward, watched the scene uselessly. I shake my head violently to erase those horrible images. It must be said that it has not changed I am still useless.

It's been nearly two years since I joined the league and I haven't been in series B yet. At this rate confronting me with Kim is just an impossible idyll. After each race, the gap between us grew even more sog. Either I was really slow or he was way too fast. Since I have been in the league he hasn't had a single defeat to his credit, always at the top of the standings. He doesn't deserve it. he does not deserve his place.
I start thinking about Ash's proposal. Although I know nothing about him yet I can't ignore the fact that he seems confident and knows exactly what he wants. I may not trust him, nothing ventured, nothing gained. I always knew it would take risks, whereas so far I've been too cautious to make any sacrifices. If it allows me to get closer to my goal, I don't care. I take my phone, the last call was from an unknown number, his number. I have nothing more to lose.

I have to remember. The purpose, my goal. Taking the first place for his sake. This is the least I can do. I will not let his dreams die with him. I am ready to take the risk. Even if I don't know if it will work or not.  I am willing to try. His dreams are all left of him. I won't let them go with the last memories that bind me to my brother. Never. If only.. if only. I could go back in time. I shouldn't have been a coward.

That could be the last opportunity. I am already a senior this year. I don't have much time left. Only a few more months before we leave... Mom hasn't talked about this. However, I have seen the letter. She is secretly planning to send me overboard to study. How could she take such an important decision by talking to me first? Yet I am the one who is agreed. And it's up to me to decide.
Less than a year. If only I could find out what happened that night.

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Thank you for reading !!!

Introducing our bestie (Joshua ) to Matthew's mom...

Do you think Matthew should and Joshua will have a quick reconciliation?

Furthermore we FINALLY get introduce to Matthew's past. It has been time.

As grieving is something quite sensitive I wanted to tackle it with a once of suspense. I hope if someone of you did experience it in any kind yall could relate to our MC and empathize with him.
Let's not forget that we should always cherish the good memories despite them being also the most painful when it comes to someone we lost.

I wanted to avoid as much shallowness when it comes to the character's emotions and thoughts.  So we could learn to get to know them together.
I hope you pay attention to all those little details.

I am so happy to write all of them!

Ps: there are two chapters this week.

I am looking forward to reading your comments.

See you next week.

Vicky❤️