impermanence

twenty-nine.

𝒎𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒍𝒚

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

i feel like the radiation is
bleeding into my bones
and i wake up on most days
with a headache

drinking water like a potion,
it doesn't regulate my emotion

i'm scared of my feelings
and i can't get out of bed
please stop the ringing
in my head

my stomach hurts
from all the nerves
so i sit down on the curb

i'm just a stupid teenager
and i don't know how
to do this anymore

i kill every plant i own
each one dies as i have grown
that hardly seems fair
and so i pull out my hair

we talk about music
it feels like we're alright
i'll be crying again tonight

i just got my voice back
but i never want to talk again
it hurts to feel this alone

all my friends must hate me
cause i don't even talk to them

i feel like the radiation is
bleeding into my brain
and i'm not ready to die

drinking soda as if it's medicine
but the taste makes me think
of summer
and i'm getting sad again

always getting sad again